AGING

Some days I actually feel young and full of ambition as I think about how far I am going to walk. But then there are other days when I can relate to the 70 year old I know. We all want to be as healthy as we possibly can so I will try to always exercise and eat the right foods. Except the day I ate the oatmeal squares for some reason was it an emotional need or just a hunger for something sweet I gave in.

Reading the paper this morning it warns "if you feel like your old self is going to be like your younger self, only greyer and saggier, you are likely to be sorely mistaken." Over the years there have always been people with more energy than I. That still holds true to this day. I know that I need to cultivate new strengths and to find new strategies to live contentedly. I need to remember there are some advantages of maturing and I am glad that I am the person I am.

Right now I am trying not to be disappointed because my book has not come again today. I did not go for a long walk in case I had to be here and sign for it.

PATIENCE

This was me waiting impatiently for the mail-man; he is a man so I guess I do not have to say mail-person to be politically correct, but my package did not arrive.
Last night I was waking up nearly every hour to see if it was time to wake up. When I did sleep I was having dreams about children I had cared for in the past.

Last night after we got home from Sandra and Randys; after inspecting the shiny car and the perfect lawn, and the beautiful tulips and eucalyptus tree and eating delicious Shrimp Jumbalia, we saw the light flickering on the phone. Yes, Ken had phoned and I had had the feeling at Sandra's house we should try skyping him. Jasmine with her big blue eyes is looking brighter and made some baby noises and Matthew was fighting sleepiness because it was time for an afternoon nap. Melina looked good especially considering the lack of sleep and the demands of the children. Ken has a nasty cold so it was good he had a day off.

We heard sad news yesterday as a good friend died from cancer. He loved books and was full of life and loved to laugh. We had just got to know Gordon better by sitting in front of him and his wife at Colebrook Church.

The health news in the paper telling us how to age is in front of me. "Most of us will need new strengths and strategies to grow older gracefully." So I will now go and read this article because I need to learn how to carry on "gracefully". I have come to accept that I will never be as healthy as I think I should be so why waste time trying new things. I applaud those who do but it can be a waste of energy if we put all our energy in trying to find something to cure all our aches and pains; there are some we will just have to live with.

THE LAST PAGE

He makes the clouds His chariot
and rides on the wings of the wind. Psalm 104

The sky is blue this morning and today promises to be sunny. I have come to the last page in my scribbler in which I write my thoughts and quotes I come across during my reading. I am glancing through it to discover if there are words I want to record before I throw it in the bin.

In the book "God Is" by David Adams Richards he writes "I believe the conversations we hold by ourselves are always with God." Actually that is a scary thought and I think I had better clean up my thinking. I think that most of us at one time or another have prayed to God, even if it is a prayer of anger and frustration. God has become to so many a swear word that comes easily to our lips.

I agree with him that modern writers write often to please other writers, or to please their readers, or to win a prize. It is seen as much more relevant to discreet religion than to deal with its past mistakes and the lunatics that it attracts even today. So they make fun of it all and instead give to us their words of wisdom.

I question "Can falsehood caste out falsehood?"

SIGNS OF SPRING

This is Morgan thinking she is so cool with her new sun glasses on!

Sun glasses
Garage Sales
Trees bursting with new life
Cherry blossoms are in their full glory
Lawns being cut
Birds chirping
Cheeky squirrel's
Skate boarders
Joggers with shorts on
Roofers beginning.
Weeds, weeds and more weeds!
My first butterfly!
Spring means open doors and open windows and the quiet street becomes alive with the voices of children playing. Right now spring feels darn cold even though the sun is shining. I like my street and my neighbors and I am very thankful we have moved here. I have had a lazy day today and have done nothing I planned, well, except pull a few weeds, watched some golf and did some reading. Oh I did go to the store but forgot to take the purse with money in it. I had enough for dad's milk and the rest will be there tomorrow.

I look forward to going to church and it makes me happy. In some mysterious way I draw strength from the belief that God loves me.


"God's love will never change us if we do not receive it." God asks only that I become real with Him and He will become real to me!
Blue Like Jazz

IT IS ALL ABOUT THE MUSIC

Soul music!

I have a title and a picture but now I need some words. Hopefully they will come by morning.

Morning has come. The raccoons have come and eaten their crunches. Yes, we gave in they destroyed our pond again and now they chase each other around on the roof. Dad took a look up in the attic just to see is there were any creatures up there. The quiet was music to our ears.

I am finishing my book "Blue Like Jazz". I think it would be a good book for any body with lots of questions about religion. He is a young man who goes through different stages in his faith. He is a loner and a writer. At college he sets up a confession stand not to hear confession but to confess all the sins of Christianity. Right now, we are faced with the abuse of priests and the abuse of the power that did not deal with the problem. The healthy thing about confession is that you then can start a new beginning.

Christianity has been too intellectual and now the mystical brings out the spiritual that people seem to want. We all like different music and different styles of worship. At times I like to be able to respond to the music when I worship and lift my hands in praise and pure joy! Young people do this at their concerts and it invigorates them.

Worship is entering into a state of wonder and of grace. Don writes about the false gospel; "that there was no magic in it, no wonder, no awe, no kingdom life burning in my chest." I love the times that I would leave the comfort of my bed and go off to worship with a small group at a sunrise service. I can never see the sunrise without feeling a sense of awe in the beauty and splendor.

"There are things you cannot understand, and you must learn to live with this. Not only must you learn to live with this, you must learn to enjoy this."

Easter has reminded us of death and it is all around us. Even in families were we struggle to be real and to keep in touch and to keep love alive; love sometimes dies.
There is grief and loneliness. Tears come to our eyes in unexpected moments and sadness clouds the beauty of the light. Even at church a hymn or a worship song can bring the tears to my eyes. The little choir group at Colebrook is made up of people I truly love and I feel blessed be their singing. I do not know the young people at Grace Point Church that lead the worship but as I see their enthusiasm I feel blessed.

Our music expresses our deepest feelings of love and of loss; joy and pain. It is all apart of who we are and who we hope to become. I enjoy being with my family and I love listening to what they have to say. I am glad that receiving and giving love strengthen us all!

Jazz music may have been invented by the first generation freed from slavery. There is emotion and everyone sings the song the way they feel it. It is okay to lift up your hands and close your eyes. Music awakens in me a sense of awe! of freedom!

AN OLD FOLK SONG.

It's only a worried man who sings a worried song.

I am starting to remember all the old songs but have decided not to worry about it. I read about a greeting card some one received that said; "Worrying does not empty tomorrow of its troubles, it empties today of its strength." Good advice which I certainly could tell some one else but find it harder when applying to my own life.

So as I started out for my walk very early Thursday morning it had started to hail a bit and the wind was brisk. Hail does not usually last long so I was not worried. The road became very slippery and several police cars, ambulances and a fire truck went screaming by. I felt sorry for the drivers on the road who had to be at work and here was me out in this miserable weather completely by choice. I did turn around sooner than I usually do and took this picture of a small wooded area on my journey. It certainly did not feel or look like spring and I would not be doing anything in the garden this day. No worries mate there are always cupboards to clean and other tasks that I keep putting off. The trouble is I start out with great vitality planning just what I am going to accomplish but by the time I get everything pulled out of place and drawers emptied I have a big mess and am running out of steam. The worst part is reading over papers that i have kept for some strange reason but everyone must be gone through because they may be important.

SINGING THE BLUES

I sure do miss her. I miss them all and a little word on face book brings a smile to my heart!

Kim and I enjoy a chat at the restaurant where she worked in New Westminster. We sure do miss her and the other grandchildren we hardly ever see. Dad likes this picture so I put it on.

I am also disappointed because my book has not arrived in the mail. My blog is suppose to be printed in a book and I have funny feelings about it. Will I be disappointed?

Anyway I am off to enjoy a "fattening" lunch with Cathy. We will be trinking tea over at at Applewood and catching up on news. Yes they do make sundae's with whipped cream and cherries.