NAME

Yes it did dad good. although he did have some pain and was glad to get home.
I got a lot done in the house and yard but still a lot more needs attention.
I worked very hard.

Before I left I had decided to write about names and how important names can be.
 Even the police say stop in the name of the law!
 In the ancient Near East. a persons name was intimately linked to his or her identity. When a person had a life change their name was changed. 
The name of Jesus was Yeshua and it meant the salvation of God.

So I was thinking about this when I was working around home and left to go visiting.
 
Usually when I visit at the Seniors Home people are in their rooms.  I glance at the name on the door and knock and wait for a reply. All was going well until I met Helen in the hall and I mistook her for Fran.    Even worse I didn't believe it when she said she was Helen.  Both of them have little dogs and reddish hair and look old.  I felt so awful and confused getting her name wrong. Time to go home!

I also spilled Jim's milkshake in the car so the day had not gone well.  It was all there but missing the whipped cream. The line up at the Dairy Queen had been a mile long just when I am already running late.

Today is not starting out so great as I am tired.

In ancient Egyptian and in Biblical times an object did not exist without a name.

In the myth of creation God calls each piece of the Universe into existence and named it; day and night,heaven and earth, sea and sky.  By doing so he was exerting his sovereignty, because the one who names another has authority.

In the ancient days a persons name was linked to their role in life, their identity and reputation.

"Because names were so significant, a common pagan practice was to try to manipulate the spiritual world by using divine names in incantations."  There is power when his name is used in love and for good I think.  Read Acts 19 if you wish.

The thing is we do not often hear about the good things people do.  There is a Christian doctor named Jonathan Miles who with his team bring Palestinian and Iraqi children to a hospital in Israel to treat them.  "They are risking their lives, in the name of Christ, to serve others.   -Lois Tverberg

Yes, God is mysterious, uncontrollable, fascinating, enigmatic, vigorous, surprising, amazing and uncontainable!  And that goes for Jesus too, who I still continue to believe is right and real and from God sent with a message that takes some effort to decode but can change how I live daily.

CONQUERORS

There is healing in the conquering of fear. 

I experienced fear at a young age when my mom disappeared through the door in the floor to the basement and my dad yelled at me to stay away.

Today I am concerned that dad is taking on too much by going for the day to Victoria and then Salt Spring to visit an old friend.  He will have to do a lot of walking.  Yesterday he tired out quickly on his walk in the park and had hip pain as we walked to the eye clinic downtown.  I expect he will come home very tired but happy he did it.  I just hope he does not have a lot of pain walking.

At the base of most of my fears have been the unknown.  This can be a mild concern about whether I turned off the oven, or the fear that comes a loved one coming home very late. I worry about those I love knowing they are vulnerable to accidents, natural disasters, sickness and disappointments.
 My mind asks the question "what if".

 I know that all of us can do what is right and still experience misfortune.

Sometimes when I wake up from a bad dream I realize the fear that comes from not being able to do something I want to do.  Now we worry about the planet earth and how we are destroying it and will we have pure water and clear air in the future.  Worry does not prevent or protect I need to take what action I can.  I can try to conserve energy and recycle more. 

Fear has driven religion and politics and can be infectious and the fear of terrorists has created more and more violence.  Anxiety is one of the most basic health destroying fear.  I am learning to face my fears and to know I am not alone in doing this.  I have to be able to also express what I am feeling and not just judge or blame some one else.

I was able to conquer my fear of flying going with dad in his small airplane to the Dominican Republic and we had some fearful things happen on the way.  I prayed all the way there.  I can not say for certain that prayer kept us safe but it did give me strength and courage.

I pray not with the expectation that things will change but just to be aware of the presence that is stronger than the fear.

"When we pray we invite God into our lives, so that our actions will be guided by a sense of a higher power."   -Martin Buber

"God's job is not to make sick people healthy, he has given us doctors and medicine to help us, but to make sick people brave."   -Harold S. Kushner

Sometimes it is helpful to meditate on the words of Jesus in the gospel of John 14:27
Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you.
Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.

SOIL

It is so good that we have a place to walk and feel the closeness of nature.  Walking on the dirt, smelling the fresh air,  seeing life all around us.

I am busy in the garden cutting down or taking off all the dead flowers.  The flowers in my garden have been abundant especially when I added new soil.  I come in covered in scratches on my legs and arms and having second thoughts about the roses.  When a thorn grabs your hair it is not funny.

Panteli dropped by as he is for the next few days house sitting for a friend.  Plans are being made to get the big tree cutter from Sandra's house to trim trees on Friday,

Dinner with Ron and Judy, our good friends, was fun and uplifting.  I like the advice she was given to live in reality not fantasy.  Staying up later does not really help I am just a morning person I guess and I find the morning goes quickly.

Today, dad and I go to the eye doctor place in Vancouver where they take pictures today.

I tell myself that we are living in a unique moment in history, one that provides an opportunity to see and understand the first-century Jewish world more closely.

When I think of the stories of Jesus I think the parable of the seeds being sewed on rocky and poor soil and it  really has a simple and yet profound meaning for us all.  Seeds of love and kindness have been sewn in out hearts and it is up to us to prepare the soil.  There are reasons that faith does not grow in all our hearts.

Love means action and response.  Living a certain way trying to be a good friend and neighbor.  We try our best but sometimes even relationships can be rocky and it is harder  to feel kindly toward them.  Love as I would like to be loved. 

I keep praying even when answers do not come, when there is still pain and brokenness.  A hard heart becomes like a hard path where negative thoughts eat at us.  Moisture brings new life that grows when we remove the thorns of doubt and bitterness.  Good soil produces good fruit but it is not always the easy path.  This is from the parable of the sower.  Luke 8:4

We do not need priests to save our souls, or to fill us with fear, but simple words that anyone can understand.  Praying for me is like breathing I just do it.  I do not understand it but I do it. 

FRIENDLY

Prayer brings the beauty of peace and restfulness when I start to feel afraid.  It is a spiritual peace.

A Jewish early morning prayer

EMERGING

The waves come gently to  merg with the shore.

Sometimes I feel like there is nothing much to get up early for.  No important job to rush out the door to, no big problems to solve, nothing special on today and yet here I am up at 5:30 to write on my blog.  I always feel happy after it is finished and thankful for the ideas that keep coming.  Putting a picture on can take 20 minutes so that is frustrating and I hope it gets better.

I will go for my walk and do some laundry and gardening and then maybe to the library.  Simple little things that fill my day and also a nap or two.  And I do not want my children or grandchildren to worry about me.  I am happy being me, wrinkles and all!

Dad worked on clearing up the back pond, a messy job, and he cut himself.  Good job Morgan was not here she hates the sight of blood.  Dad just carries on even if he bleeds on his pants and on everything around him.  Then he was off for a walk and wanted to go alone.  I am still finding it tiring from the wedding experience when we both came home exhausted.  Yes a good night's sleep helps.

The pond looks like a major problem as there seems to be holes everywhere.

Today will fall into the usual routine of walking, gardening and cleaning and washing.  I am thinking as I start out walking down the hill,  how we so often take easy things for granted and going up the hill makes me aware of the effort it takes when things become difficult.  I may complain to myself but it is good for me I am sure/

Ron phoned last night about going out for supper to-night.  We do not see them anymore as we changed churches and the home group has disbanded.  They also have grandchildren so are busy.


There are many books being written now about the Re-emerging Church addressing the thoughts that some of the complaints about church and religion are valid while others are just neurotic outspoken twits  that can turn up at the most unexpected places.  I never bring up religion personally except here where there is a warning at the top.

Books that express the view that, when all is said and done, God is greater than religion so cannot be put into a box.  So many think that Christians are these perfect people who follow the teachings of Jesus with precision.  Since the Jesus that is emerging from contemporary biblical scholarship is startling more radical than the picture we were comfortable in earlier church experiences.

.Did he or did he not claim to have a unique status of divinity?  I believed he did and he also wanted to empower others, all human beings regardless of sex, or race or social standing to obtain their essential divine identity.

"He is startling more radical that the Christ offered to us by any of the existing churches; he is a mystic revolutionary in every dimension, who wanted nothing less than the transformation of all the laws and conditions of this world into those of the kingdom of God.  No other spiritual teacher had so comprehensive and radical vision of the limitations of all forms of religious or political power; and this vision threatened and threatens all elites, dogmas, and hierarchies of any kind."

"Who was Jesus the man and what connection is there between the historical person and the cosmic Christ?" As a mystical teacher what he stood for can be a positive force for world change even today.
and what emerges is a sometimes skeptical inquiry that challenge the very heart of the gospels.

Am I ready to accept this more unnerving and revolutionary way of thinking?
I like to keep life simple.

BEGININGS

W

A fantastic place for two people to begin a life together.  Their lives which began as a friendship has now grown into a true engagement. 

As we grow older it is harder to see the promise of each day as a beginning of something new. 

"What we are really meant to do in life never stops shadowing our souls." --Joan Chittister

This day lies before me and prepares me to live into my calling that is mine alone.  Are there depths within me that are waiting to be discovered.  Creativity changes as we begin a new stage in our lives.
This day is a gift waiting to be openned. 

"Knowing others is wisdom.
Knowing oneself is enlightenment."

 

  Love I believe is one of the strongest forces in the world and can make us really happy or cause us deep pain. 

 

 Our love for each other is just a taste of the awesome love that Jesus has for all of us.

Uri keeps busy by playing in the dirt, running around and eating a plum.
 He has a new cousin who is nine months old.  Both of them have many new beginnings before them.
I can begin today to put an extra effort into being healthy and happy just to be me.  What better place to be than where I am surrounded by loving family.

God's own love reigns over us all! ! !

It felt good to be invited over to Sandra and Randy's where between the two of them they fed us to overflowing.  Dad brought the rhubarb pie home with him.  I think he is spoilt but so am I!

I learned in church today to be patient and like compost becomes good soil over time and with the different things put into it.   A message that was appropriate after our long wait for the bride and groom the day before.   We are in the process of being beautified by all the messy and all the difficult things that continually pop up in our lives and offer us our new beginnings  We are to share that beauty with others.

 What keeps me from the way of compassion and understanding that has a call on each of our lives?
 This is the true purpose of confession , letting go of all guilt and moving on.

The church can be a reminder of God's presence in our world and move us to become creative with our questions that can lead us deeper into mystery of life.

Becoming a family

JOY

What a gift of  joy it has been to see our children grow up and have children of their own.
 Our children have and continue to enrich our lives with laughter and  precious moments rich with love and blessings.  Caring for them and sharing their lives has been an adventure!

Each day that we can see them reminds me of all I have enjoyed with my family.  We had great fun playing baseball as a family, they were all very good and good sports too I believe.  Your dad and I had fun hitting the ball and running or catching. 

I would walk down to the beach with them when we lived in Tssawasen with the two little ones in the wagon and Carol and Rick walking along with the dog.  About 5k I think.  We would stay all day and the children gone along fine.  I would find a shady spot on the dike and sit and read and go in the water when it got too hot.  We had a lunch so we could stay all day. They all became good swimmers and good athletes. 

The true reality for me is that God did sustain me and I have learned what is of true value in life.

Times have changed and we certainly have.  My legs were very weak this morning so I did a shorter walk (3k) down the hill and up again.  I actually did the hard part and if I finished the rest it would be about 5k.  It is hard to judge how far we walk in the Forest about 3 or 4k I think.  I will take a quick walk to the store and then have a rest so I can party later.  lol

As we watched Ava, the daughter of a friend, get married we are also filled with joy for the young couple as they shared their promises to each other in front of those who have touched their lives.  This family of five has grown up so quickly. 

It was hard to find the marina park even though dad insisted he knew the way.  It was a magnificent place to hold a wedding with a view of the water and tucked away amongst the trees the tables were set with white cloths, flowers and candles.  But even in this perfect setting it was hard to stand around and wait for the young couple to arrive three hours late.  It was getting chilly and dad's back was painful and the food would not be ready for another hour so we both agreed it was time to leave.  We got home hungry and so tired and so glad to be home.  We congratulated the young couple and left, so thankful that we had a handicap parking tag and did not have to walk the long walk to the parking area, where the others had parked.

Brides always look radiant with joy and everyone could see Jeff adores her.

Looking forward to lunch at Sandra and Randy's today.

SILENCE

The silence of the night was broken by the crash of our neighbor's metal garbage can.
Dad peered out the window to see the raccoon picking through the garbage.  On our morning walk we saw all the cans on the street had been knocked over, but not ours because it was not out on to the street.

As I pray and as I write I listen in the silence of the morning for guidance.  I like all humans have intellectual limitations and a sense of spiritual poverty that makes it difficult to express in words what I would like to.
This is why the spiritual is often expressed in metaphor and symbolic.  I talk to him and then I listen.  I believe that his love lives on among us all.

Some may define this as wishful thinking and sometimes when all I hear is silence I can experience doubt which is the shadow side of faith.  The joy of the faith of others helps me at these times.

Dad and I decided to drive out to give Theresa her card and birthday gift.  Dad wrote in her card while I was doing the Sept. cards to mail away.  I was having what I call a slow brain day losing things here and there.  Anyway we got to Theresa`s house and the card we thought must have been left at home as we did not have it.

This did not dampen the day at all.  We had a bit of lunch and then headed out to walk and ride bikes and skate boards to the school play ground.  Dad drove in the car because the walk would be painful.  On the way Morgan fell on her skate board and at the same time swallowed and choked on a cherry stone.  Her and Ben had gone ahead of Theresa and myself and fortunately by the time we caught up she had managed to cough it up.  She rode the rest of the way in the car with grandpa who also had a band aide for her skinned knee.

Morgan was the first up to bat as a game of baseball got under way.  She did well with a little help from big brother on how to hold the bat.  Dad was a good sport until his hip started to hurt and he also skinned his elbow as he dived for the ball.  Oh to be young again and to be able to do what we use to be able to do.  We had fun doing and then watching.

Before we knew it it was time to say good-bye.
We drove home silently enjoying the memories of our visit.

THE DIFFERENCE

What a difference an hour can make in the morning.

What a difference a day can make as the earth continues to turn through the seasons and each season has it's own message for us.  Fall  is the time of harvest as the days become shorter.  Whatever my mood is I accept what it is trying to say to me.  My thoughts can make a difference.  There are things in our lives that we cannot control but I know that the seasons will change and that joys and sorrows await us all.

And every morning there are millions of others who are facing similar difficulties that in some cases feel overwhelming.  I am not alone.

"how far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of the weak and the strong.....because some day in life you have been all of these."  -George Washington Carver

I went visiting and listened to others tell me their stories.

"Which has more value in life, where have I grown the most, where have I discovered wisdom, learned patience, understanding, equanimity and forgiveness--in the hard times or the good ones?
The question asked by Ajahn Chah.  --spiritual meditation teacher.

We all make a lasting difference in the many lives we touch.

Some things are done quietly and in secret, others are as simple as letting someone know you care.

We all make a difference in our own way.  Sometimes it is in giving sometimes in receiving.




















. 

DARKNESS

Looking out my window at the darkness and feel the coolness of the morning it seems like fall is here. We have been watching some dark mysteries on our T.V. and maybe that is why it has been harder to sleep.  Anyway I am awake now.

I get so absorbed in my morning prayer and writing I do not even notice the light coming.  I am so fortunate to be able to do what brings me happiness and a sense of accomplishment and enjoyment.
I am hopeful that maybe something I write may have meaning for someone else too.  It is a rich blessing to be able to accept change and still find enjoyment in life.

"A bird does not sing because it has an answer.
     It sings because it has a song."    Chinese proverb.

There is a song that only I can sing that has become clearer and stronger as I become older.  Each soul has been given a song that comes from deep within their very heart. 

So often we get so busy and preoccupied with what needs to be done we can forget to sing.  If I feel that my life has significance then it makes life worth singing about.  Enjoy the music and feel the love!

We made very good time on our journey to Burnaby but city traffic takes a certain skill that I am thankful dad has.  Nearly an hour each way and we consider that good.  From Shirley's place we drove into the center of town to enjoy a light lunch at the Sylvia.  Old friends are really the best as we have so many memories together and share the joy of seeing each other. 

I leave them for a few minutes to take a few pictures and am immediately reminded on the far side walk there is a walking lane and a bike lane.  I move over to the right side just in time.  Lots of families enjoying their bike rides and others just enjoying the beach.

I was pondering what the words made in God's image mean and I think it simply means a little part of you and me is a part of something bigger.  I am thankful when the light shines to brighten up the day and the darkness has to flee.

RIGHT ON

Yes we count our blessings to be so healthy and to be able to enjoy walking together.

We are so fortunate to have this cool place to walk where it is even cool on a hot day!

Thinking back over my life I think that I have had a good life.  Sure there have been goofy mistakes but that is how we learn, and then you forget all about them. Imperfection keeps life interesting.

Life sure seems to be moving on quickly except for times when waiting for news about our Mary.

I was just noticing on my long walk  early in the morning how differently people say "good morning".
Some just give a little nod or some a big smile and you feel they really mean it.  Some even say have a "good day".

Dad had his walk in the forest and I got good and dirty in the garden.

Today we are driving over to Burnaby to take Shirley Fowler out for lunch.  We have not seen her for several months.  Going to the Sylvia.

                                               HOPE SPRINGS ETERNAL

 This is why I wanted to go to the other end of the Water Shed, to take this picture.  They have removed the big pipe where people could get water and there is just this little water flowing over the rocks.  The water is supposed excellent for drinking and while we were there a man came with about four big huge bottles to get some and was annoyed it had been removed.  The sign says the water is not approved.

HOPEFUL

My morning started with feeling hopeless because my picture would not upload.  After many many tries it has gone on and I do not know why.  Both dad and Panteli have had a go at it and it still does not work,  But I must continue to be hopeful.

My morning continued to be frustrating  I could not find my shoes to head out for a nice cool walk in the fresh morning air.  Found them finally under the wrong bed, actually in my computer room.  I never take them off there.  What was I thinking?

Usually I find it easier to be hopeful in the morning especially when I am praying but during the day when  things are  not working and I do not know why or how to fix  it I can feel hopeless.
But then I realize there are always things to try and others can help so that keeps us hopeful.

Anyway dad and I decided to go for a picnic on the other side of the Water Shed Park where there is a nice stream with fish in it and lots of shady trees.  We found ourselves trying to park in a tow-a-way zone with a cop following us and one already parked there.  We were going to climb over the railroad tracks and under a fence, which we had done before.  Realizing that we did not have driving licenses with us we drove on to a proper entrance.  It is good to keep on the right side of the law!

We had a long walk to get where we wanted to go but found a nice bench to sit and have our picnic on.  It was a popular spot and interesting dogs with their people came by. There were some little hilly places were your feet could slip and slide and run away with you.  It was fun.

 Talked to Theresa on the phone and got caught up on all she has been doing.  Very busy young lady with talking her wedding photo's and editing them and taking the children out to keep them happy.  She is signed up for her teaching assistance course in Sept.

Sandra is exhausted from her flight home and busy week in Kirchner but glad to be home back in her own bed.  They will not be coming over for supper.  Pentali cheerful chopped and cooked an excellent supper for us.

I was glad to talk to Theresa on the phone as I was feeling a little worried about her.
She takes along a lot doing her wedding photo's and all the work that involves.
Panteli talks to Carol daily on the computer so we were able to keep in touch too.  Kim is moving into a new little place of her own soon.  Carol's dog and her dog had become great pals while she has been living at home.

Some days it is more of a challenge to live by faith the whole day through than others.  I admire the people I know who are facing their own private calamities with the grace of inner strength. 

We all take it a day at a time and it is good when you can go your own pace.  The Oak Ave. children's center needs some diapers so will take a drive over there today. 

EYES

It will be good to see Sandra again now that she is back home.  She will be tired coming home on a late flight I think.  It was so good that she could be there for \Mary's birthday and what a happy time that would be for all!

I am trying to write an inspiring blog about the eyes of faith but right now I feel more like they are blinded with frustration as I am having computer problems..   

The eyes of faith should help me to see beyond the worries and concerns of this life, but at times I find it hard. 

I am so fortunate that as I enter our church there are happy people there to greet me and give me hugs.  So first I see them and I know and feel apart of the community.  I know the people who are having difficulties and I am glad to see some of them there.

This Sunday I have gone by myself as dad is home watching baseball.

I drink in the beauty of the sanctuary, the flowers and the candles and the Bible open on the table.
I look forward to singing and listening but first the Christ candle is lit.  The light of Christ glows before me to be a reminder  His light shines within me and I know that his breath is breathing on us all.  Preparing me for worship.

"The eye is the lamp of the body and if your eye is healthy your whole body is healthy."

A person with a good eye will see the needs of others whereas a bad eye is selfish and stingy blind to the needs of others.  A good eye sees the sacred in the every day and believes in a strong relationship that also sees our needs.  Yes His eye is on the sparrow so trust is vital in our relationship!  Yes, I can face the future with a calmness that is a gift of a loving Father.

"Whoever has a good eye, a humble spirit and a modest soul is a disciple...... who enjoys this world
and inherits the world to come."   -Mishnah, Avot 5:19

The mystical path lies right before our eyes as we open our eyes wide to be a good friend and a good neighbor and seek wisdom for the future.  The nicest thing anyone can say is that we are good hearted and generous.

If you are generous your whole life will show it.  Illumination comes as we need it and we see the potential that we felt we had lost; like I felt yesterday.

Dad and I went walking in the woods although both of us had back pain.  It was enjoyable and we met people and dogs and a family of bikers having great fun.

Pentali is making supper for us tonight, Monday, and Sandra and Randy are invited.  I am looking forward to it!

Good on you Ken for the e-mail that was good to see!

THE EYE

Often what we see with our eyes brings back memories.

MEETING.

        We often meet people on our walks in the park as I do on my morning walks

As I walked by the Safeway my elderly friend asked if he could walk me home, but I was not on my way home yet. So I carried on in the opposite direction. It is the little things that make life interesting.  At least for me.  Met another friend who said she had missed seeing me so we had a little chat.

I believe the spirit of Jesus wants to meet us on this journey called life.
Our circumstances may not change but he walks with us even all the way home.

"In everyone there is something of his fellow man
Hence "love your neighbor"
for he is really you yourself." -- Rabbi Moses Cordovero

So loving God requires, and is expressed best, through love of our neighbors and those we meet daily. I  met and had a walk with my neighbor Gundy today so we caught up on family news.

Jesus states that "in everything do to others what you would have them do to you".  This means a desire for the ultimate good of others.  We are alike in our need to be loved and our need to see our own weaknesses and failures.

I enjoyed the coolness of the day and even made it over to the store to pick up a few things. 
Dad says he likes it hot but I do not.  It is good that the shade deck makes a excellent place to sit and read, but it is too hot to work in the yard, or even in the house, and sleeping is misery. Actually dad nearly burnt his feet walking out to the deck on the hot sidewalk.  Just proves he can run fast when he wants to!

Dad and I enjoyed lunch at the wharf in Ladner.  I often suggest we could just order one item because we eat so much less now and we are full.  He loves his fish and chips and I have my usual salad so it seems it is not going to happen.

Looking at all the boats tied up at the dock I remembered when we had a boat for several years.  On one of our adventures through the gulf islands we got stranded on an island where we camped for the night and in the morning the tide was out and the boast was sitting on the sand.  Great boaters eh!

It is hard to believe it is Sunday already so it will be church for us and Panteli is out again tonight for supper.  He has had a busy week-end but the exams have now been accomplished.

STUDY

We live in a beautiful world and so much to be thankful for!

The coolness of the morning does my heart and soul good.

I tried to do some visiting by phone but all I got was answering machines.  Maybe too tired with the heat to talk.  I can understand that.

I feel like there is an ocean of knowledge for us to learn and truth may come drip by drip
 not as a huge wave but with little epiphanies along the way.

My book says it better: "The rabbis commented that each line of the biblical text is a "jewel with seventy faces" that we should "turn it and turn it again".  God's Word is limitless in its ability to speak into our lives".  Covenant, commitment, relationship are the building blocks of faith.

There is a lot of anger and hostility that creates prejudice and blocks the flow of the goodness and richness of life.  Jesus stepped out of the past covenant to speak to the Jewish community about the truth of the mercy and love of God.  There would be anger and misunderstandings between their God and them.

I know I can be angry with those I love, but always forgiveness and unending love.....!

Before the covenant I think they lived in a land cursed by legends.

The Jewish people did believe that they had a covenant relationship, a mutual agreement, with a holy God.  In fact his holiness was frightening and so they made sacrifices and believed that the smoke drifted up to heaven and pleased this God so high and mighty.  This was a belief in many cultures and today some think that if they kill the unbelievers they are pleasing God.    This reminds me of the shameful past in our religious history.

The Jews heard that it was mercy not sacrifice that pleased God.  The psalms reveal the unfailing love .that was present with them and which filled the earth.  Psalm 33:22.  As a parent I know the feeling of wanting to protect my children but realized that even though I loved them and wanted the best for them I had to let them go and make their own mistakes.  But my heart's desire is for us to always be in a loving relationship to the best we could.

I like what the New Testament says about the smoke of the incense that is an offering of all the prayers of all the people.  Revelation 8:3.  This was in a vision seen by the author of this book called revelation..

"Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror,
then we shall see face to face".  1Corinthians 13:12

There is a remarkable story in 2Chronicles 28:1-15 that those who like to quote about the fighting and killing omit "Then the men who were designated by name arose, took the captives, and clothed all the naked ones from the spoil;  and gave them clothes and sandals, fed them and gave them drink, anointed them with oil, and led all the feeble ones on donkeys and brought them to Jericho, the city of palm trees, to their brothers.

Study is important in all of life, history, geography, language, and culture and the teachings of the Bible.

With Jesus everything changed because the sacrificial system and all it's ceremonies, all it's rituals and external trappings meant nothing if there was no change in the heart attitude towards others.

We planned to go to a movie but stayed home and watched an Australian D.V.D. called Murray Whekan.  It is a funny drama I guess you would call it.

WALKING

Hotter again yesterday.

I went walking in the forest with dad instead of going visiting.  It would be too hot and I think people would just be resting as I am happy to do.  Every time we go in the forest we see new interesting things.  Dad is also showing me how to use a walking stick the right way.  He does it very well but has been having more practice than I have.

We sat on a big very round rock on top of a cliff, where right below us the stream was gently flowing.

It was very quiet and the only movement was a leave or two falling down from a high tree.  The shade was welcoming and just being out of the hot sun so much better.

I made a big salad when we got home (not as big as Panatellas nor as fancy as Kim's) for dad who was reaching for his cookies and saying he is not hungry.  Armed with iced tea and books we headed out to the lovely little shade deck.

Not very exciting you may think but if I think of each day as a gift of time that we get to be with one another, then it is a blessing.  We are now free of many of our previous responsibilities and have time to be aware of our own emotional and physical needs.  Through many trials and tribulations we have learned to adapt and sometimes even compromise.  We are equals.  Yes, there are still moments of frustration,  misunderstandings but we have more patience with each other.  A sense of humor helps as dad helps me over the log I tripped over last time.

Some things we will never agree on and that is okay because the love of our family is the most important thing in both our lives. 

Getting over getting older helps and I am thankful for what we have now!

THE TORAH

Too hot for me yesterday but I am thankful it is cooler in the morning.

Mary is slowly getting better but on a very bland diet.  Looking forward to celebrating her birthday on Sunday.  I like to think our prayers helped.


I decided to be very Jewish  and do a lot of reading especially from the Jewish point of view.
I will be using the book "Walking in the Dust of Rabbi Jesus by Lois Tverberg.

The Torah for them meant a book that can produced endless new insights.  From the beginning we are all called to be God's image bearers.

Evidently in the past the study of the Torah was "the elixir of life" for the Jewish man.  What we translate as law, Jews more correctly understood as "guidance" or "teaching".  They were trying to uncover the very thoughts of God.--  from The Treasure of the Text   They saturated their lives with these scriptures.   For example "A tree of life is she to those that lay hold on her".  Wisdom was feminine.

There was great excitement in  2Kings :22  when Hilkiah, the high priest found the book of the Law and then the King called together all the elders of Judah and Jerusalem and all the people and read to them from the temple the ancient words so that they could renew their covenant in the presence of the Lord.  Keep these commandments, regulations, and decrees with all your heart and soul. 

Certainly the words of Jesus are Jewish and bring to life the ancient scriptures in a new light.  He knew the stories and the prophecies that had been established long before his birth.  Over the centuries Jews have met to discuss what are the essential meanings that give life meaning..

I have also finished reading the book "A Cup of Friendship" by Deborah Rodriguez about the horrors in  Afghanistan.  The bombings, the Taliban, the warlords, the indoctrination of young people using the Koran to turn them into Terrorists and the vile and ugly treatment of women.  They are abused from an early age and really have no protection from men and can be stoned or imprisoned if they refused to be prostitutes.  Their families who are in debt to the warlords have to sell their children to be beggars or prostitutes.

It is very hard for us to understand people who lived so differently from us.  Uneducated wandering tribes who had to fight for their existence and called upon the gods to help them.

I know that I question what I can learn from the old patriarchs, with their multiple wives and concubines?  What was the point of all the sacrifices?  Why did Joseph's older brothers hate him so much?  There would certainly be problems in polygamous families and rivalry even among family members, they were warriors. 

The whole point is that we can learn from their mistakes and discover time and time again we reap what we sew.

Some of the quotes that Jesus makes are better understood by those who knew the ancient scriptures.

EVIDENCE

Evidence my garden is getting over grown, too many flowers crowded into one big mass.
 It is full of bees and rocky places so I have to tread carefully.  I just watered myself trying to move the hose and stepped on my favorite flower.  Actually the water felt very refreshing.

The three of us drove to Abbotsford and the journey had a few unexpected twists and turns.  One being that the car we were picking up had a flat tire.  Finally the paper work was accomplished and the tire fixed so we stop in Langley for a light little lunch.  I also paid a visit to Chapters and yes I bought a book.  Now all I need is time to read.

Dad and I were picked up in style by Jane and Geof as we drove to the restaurant on River Road.  Sitting outside on the terrace watch the roarers go by was a perfect place to enjoy our birthday supper.  .the temperature was perfect..our meals were excellent.  They even had a big gluten free menu.  This would have been unheard of even a year ago. 

                                          The birthday girls celebrating.

We drove home along River Road in a leisurely speed.  Very refreshing evening.

"At some point along the line, a particular kind of evidence emerges,
one which suggests a personal engagement with it,
and none of this is reducible to the facts themselves, in the sense of being
ineluctably motivated by a bare account of them."   from Faith and Reason by Terry Eagleton

I read a sentence and it gets me thinking about the word evidence.
What evidence do I have that what I believe to be true is true?
I know that I have had an experience that I believe was the touch of the presence of the Holy Spirit.
An awesome and powerful feeling that felt like love was being poured into me.
That is the evidence that lives within me.

You could say "I wanted that loving feeling" in that I was open and longing for a deeper experience of God's grace.

Love is irrational.  I know that Jesus said to love God and your neighbor as yourself.    Faith consists for me as independent of a reasonable explanation.

I am so fortunate to live in a country where there is religious freedom.  I have been grateful to worship with a community that some may call fanatics but they have an enthusiasm and a lively faith that I found rejuvenating.  It attracted many openly wounded people which made them very real and they did not need to hide their emotions.

 I do not want to be called the frozen chosen and as a believer I want to experience the joy and the love that is available to all!  Happiness is one of the driving forces of life!

YOUTH

We are very very happy for Leah and Craig who are now engaged!
Leah looks radiant in their picture together and sounded very happy on the phone with me.
Congratulations you two!

At the bridal shower Ava was also looking beautiful and happy.
She also seems to be engaged to a very fine young man.

 Feeling secure in your love for another person is exciting.
A mature person is able to put the happiness of another person before their own.
This takes time and growth in understanding and caring.

There will always be moments of immaturity when the need to be right,
 makes us wrong.
At times I make that mistake!
I need to be as healthy as I can and get rid of unwanted stress and worry.
I have to let others take responsibility for their own lives.
I like quiet in the morning and at night.
I respect other religions but I follow the path of Jesus.
 He believed in healing the sick even though it broke the Sabbath law because it was the loving thing to do.

Love gives to life passion and meaning that can heal or wound.   Takes commitment and forgiveness.

I believe that there is a mystery that allows the incarnation of Jesus Christ to live in me and reveal to me the beauty and wonder of my humanness!  Thank you to our minister Daniel!

Jane and I will finally be celebrating our birthday dinner tonight!

Panteli has arrived and getting settled in and off with dad to pick up the car in Abbotsford this morning.

So I will now that I am a little awake will go down and put the air conditioner on which means opening the doors to the cool air and maybe the cat who loves to come in and find his favorite chair.
It is not so warm today.  Yesterday was a perfect temperature for me.

Yes ken we have seen a giraffe I think it was in Hawaii or was it there. 
Great fun with the young ones eh!

.

IDIOSYNCRATIC

I think that I am a little idiosyncratic ( a personnel peculiarity of taste and opinion.)  Given that we are all human this probably applies to us all.As human beings we perceive reality in the light of our past experiences and current convictions.

I am thinking that some of the opinions about Jesus coming out now that portray him as just a good man who said some perplexing things have a predetermined agenda and may be even idiosyncratic.

I have on several occasions driven to White Rock to attend some luncheon or tea and got lost so I am not too confident about driving there.  Sunday I started off for the bridal shower knowing I had only four turns to make but with me it only takes one turn.  Yes, I did it.  It was a fun time and although I find big groups a little off setting this time was okay.  I actually won one game and lost one and ended up with a prize.

The bad news was that I rushed home to attend a birthday party and I had got the date wrong.  I felt terrible.  Yes I had written it down but still got it wrong.  Too much on my mind I guess and the warm weather makes me tired.

Great news that Craig and Leah are engaged.  They are a very special couple and we love them both a lot.  Craig already is family!

SINPLFY

So many things are best kept simple.

 I love it when the great grandchildren create their own fun and games. 

So grateful Mary is well enough to be home and I know she will receive lots of love and care.

We enjoyed seeing Tavis's wee apartment.  It was good people took turns dropping by as there were not many seats, camping seats at that, and not a lot of room.  She is happy and excited started her newest adventure in life.  Work and school.

Searching to find meaning and direction in my life has been a challenge.  I now accept that I do not have the energy to what others take on.  But then even Muhammad could not move the mountain. Right?

If I find my own sense of well-being and happiness then as simple as that may seem 
 it is my gift to others.   

Like the song says "Let your light shine, you in your corner and I in mine!"

We have within us the ability to reason which is good, but there is a time to just believe with the simpleness of a child and feel joyful.  Christ says he promised us that our joy may be full, perfected and sealed with the everlasting Holy Spirit.  I believe that Jesus loved to laugh out loud and that he enjoyed life even when his own disciples did not understand him.

Jesus simply wanted us to know that there is a love deep  within us.    Remove the fog of legalism to obtain  a simple heart to heart relationship with God.

The Old Testament, which is still relevant for  today is myths created out of the Jewish imagination to explain where they have come from.  Oneis not to blame God for our own evil thoughts nor expect Him to rescue us from the suffering in this life.  We are to help one another through difficult times..
,
Jesus. the Jew takes the simple truth out of the complicated stories and his words continue to speak to us today!

HELPLESSNESS

In my computer room I am surrounded with many family pictures and many good memories.

Good news that Mary is showing improvement.  I was out in the yard when you called Sandra and dad was having a nap but that certainly is a big relief to hear Mary will soon be able to go home where she will have excellent care I know!

Dad had a bike ride and then we went to look at electric bikes but they were not the right ones.
We had a visit from Cathy and got caught up with the family news and her success at school.
We got so busy talking we did not even have a cup of tea.  We even discussed religion a controversial and sensitive subject at the best of times!

A busy week-end with a house warming, a shower and a birthday party.

We all have different problems, some that make us feel helpless and especially when it concerns family.   

I am reading about Ole Hallesby who was imprisoned for his resistance to the Nazi regime.  He writes   "Do not be anxious because of your helplessness.  Above all do not let it prevent you from praying.  Helplessness is the real secret and the impelling power of prayer; for it is then we can open our hearts to Jesus, and let him help us in our distress, according to his grace and mercy."

A brave man who lived what he believed and he spoke out of humility and a passionate belief';  that I feel I can trust.

Our very state of mind can be transformed and lifted out of confusion if through prayer we feel comfort and guidance and a ability to be more loving.

Our continual mistake is that we are unable to concentrate on the present and so we do not observe that life is flowing through us and the deepest cries of our hearts are being heard and are being answered although we do not know or understand but are called to watch and pray and believe and receive. 

Each day is a gift of grace that can teach us and also free us.
 We all have a lot to learn about ourselves and about trying to understand others.

Prayer helps.
 Prayer helps me to accept what I cannot change and be patient for the changes that will come sometimes unexpected.
Prayer is a way I express my love for others.

WISHING

Wishing we could be with Mary at this time when she is so very sick in the hospital in Kitchner.
So thankful that her mom, Sandra will be with her now.  She surprised them by coming a day early and what a great surprise.  We talked to Mary on the phone and she sounds very weak.  She is not able to eat but she did a little walking today.

We think of Mary as one of the many inspirational people in our family.  She has set so many goals and been able to reach them.  She has our love and our continued support in our prayers.

The unexpected can come into any of our lives and challenge the depths of who we are.  As long as we can reach out to one another and even the smallest prayer whispered in faith can bring healing light into the situation.

I did my visiting today but it was hard to focus and listened to the ones I visited.  I am always amazed at how many experiences these elderly people have been through.  I was glad I had taken Jim his milkshake he is looking more frail each time I go.  The stall there really appreciate my visiting so even though I came home tired I was glad I had gone.

Yesterday dad and I had a walk in the woods later in the day and the colors were all so much richer and there was a golden light all around. 

Sometimes I forget that I am not just writing my own little journal like I used to do and then I wonder if I have said too much.  I had not slept well so I was not thinking straight.

I trust that everyone is like family to me when they read my thoughts.

Ancient scripture believed in the healing power of the Lord God and I do too.

"For I will restore health unto thee. . .saith the Lord."  Jeremiah 30:17   I am believing that Mary will be restored to health and improve day by day.

INSIGHT

Life is a gift to  be treasured!

I need time just to gaze at my garden drinking in the beauty of my  flowers one at a time.

I sit in the morning and gaze out on our small back yard and let my thoughts wander and the peace of God enter my soul with a gentleness and a calmness.  I know that today will be an ordinary day like many others but yet there is a joy that transforms ordinariness.

Looking back on my life I feel content.  I was born to the right parents, married the right man, had the right children and all the wrong parts had a purpose.  For this morning I have this feeling that there has been a rightness about my life that can now fill me with the happiness of satisfaction.

I have been on the right path!

 

I've been young and loved to play with kittens!

I've been full of fun and loved to jump and hop.

I would walk across to the swimming pool and spend all day there and even worked there one summer.  This is Ben having a diving to get the stone game with Auntie Sandy!

I have been a daughter, a sister, a wife and a mother and now I am a grand mother.

Now I am a great grandmother.  Yeah!  All these roles have consumed my energy.

 I have know times when I would worry and stress about small things and times when I have had to come to terms with life.  I like to lol which I find out means to laugh out loud Ben informs me.

 

PARADOXES

 It felt very muggy all day and then all of a sudden the sky darken and the thunder and lightning struck.  There was very heavy rain and wind.  Very scary thunder!  Thankfully we were back from the store when the worst of the storm hit.

There is always a lot of things to be done in my yard but there is always a time to just sit and enjoy.
Dad and I agreed we would have a quiet day but did do a trip to Chapters and I got several books
Thanks to Carol and Panteli!

We had a wonderful visit with Kim and she loves to spoil us and we love it too.  Glad her trip home went well!  Thanks Kim for blessing us with good, colourful memories.

Thanks Sandra and Randy for making us all feel welcome!  I think my camera is around here somewhere so I will put pictures on soon.

Everyone was disappointed that Craig and Leah did not turn up.  Where were you guys?

Some times life can be a paradox  especially when we do not have the whole picture.

The Bible is full of what may seem illogical to our minds because it describes a reality beyond human imaginings.

Reading the Bible can be difficult as I come across paradoxes because this is the nature of all our lives.  Nothing is black or white.  Their is goodness and there are false assumptions within us all.

"The Hebrew mind was willing to accept truths taught on both sides of the paradox and recognize that mystery and apparent contradictions are often signs of the divine."   -- Marvin Wilson

"All true explanations of God's nature must openly include paradoxical concepts my mind cannot grasp."  --Athol Dickson

I like to believe that it is possible to find a solution for all our problems and that answers will come when we take time to sit and enjoy what we have.  Within each of us is a hidden store of determination that is there for us to draw upon.

"Be who you are and say what you feel,
because those who mind don't matter
and those who matter don't mind."   --Dr. Seuss

I have always thought I could be my worst enemy but now I know I need to be my best friend!

Memories are what colour our world like the song   "memories like the colour of my mind".  I can hear the tune but forget the words.

THE MIND

Dad and I have had a lot of stimulating conversations over the last weeks with all our company and with our family.  We have also been reliving some memories.

The subject came up about negative thoughts that can get a hold of us and be hard to shake.  We are all aware of thoughts speaking to us continually so of course want to be positive.  For instance I have been trying to think of what to write about on my blog and my mind is empty of anything worth writing about.

We have had a fantastic visit with Kim and the day at the park was very refreshing just to enjoy the coolness of the water park and the swimming pool.  Ben had a great time with his Auntie Sandy both swimming and diving for rocks like two fishes.

Today we were at Sandra and Randy's house for a barbecue and bean casserole and a great salad that Kim made.  We watched the women's soccer team and were disappointed at their loss but it was an exciting game.  Then some of the young ones played games like Crockett and bean bad.  Randy was a good sport and kept us all laughing whether we were watching or playing.  Of course we ate until we felt like we could burst.

While we talking I was thinking that we never really understand how another thinks or feels.

Also to never underestimate the power of the mind.

The problems we all face and the way we deal with them contain a potential for transforming grace.
The Bible reminds us to take our thoughts captive and not allow them to imprison us.  Our thoughts carry within them the power of emotions.  According to Buddhist thought the need to understand what is one's own well being and that of others.  One thought can lead to a chain re-action that can be either positive or negative.  Theresa talked about Mindfulness-based stress reduction which centers on the present moment.  The present becomes more important than the past. 

I was created to find happiness and joy but that does not prevent the awareness of sadness.

The word emotion covers any feeling that moves the mind and  conditions the brain to adopt a certain perspective on life.  Leaving Sandra's I felt a sadness in knowing that life is changing all around me and there will never be a day like the one we just had together.  There was sadness saying good-bye to Kim at the airport and it was felt by us all. 

We are all on a journey and like a tired traveller need to find rest and serenity our minds also need to find rest.  Life is so precious  and calming the mind of it's anxiety is important.  I do what I can do and take one day at a time. 

I was sorry to miss the program on Emily Carr maybe it will come on again.

THE EYE

The eye is the lamp of the body.  If your eyes are healthy, your whole body will be full of light.
.but if your eyes are unhealthy, your whole body will be full of darkness,

How can we know what Jesus really meant?

Having a good eye in Biblical times meant to look out for the needs of others and be generous in giving to the poor.  But to have a bad eye is to be greedy and selfish,  blind to the needs of others around you.

The generous (literally generous is a good eye) will themselves be blessed, for they share their food with the poor.   Proverbs 22:9

A modern Jewish teacher asked his disciples "What is the very best path to take in life?"  The first answer was to have a good eye.  Then being a good friend and neighbor.  Having a good heart was the correct answer because it included all the rest.  If you have a good heart, you will have all the other things, including a "good eye".

"He never failed to look into the eyes of the customers, because they reflected deeper truths than any momentary feelings of impatience or hunger or disappointment.  The eyes of a man betrayed his heart.  Even with a smile, an evil man's eyes were as hard and shallow as a dry riverbed."
From the book "A Cup of Friendship" about a coffee shop in Afghanistan run by a American woman.

I have now started another book about Afghanistan and it clearly reveals the poor quality of life for a people who live in fear,

Holiday Monday.

Ben and Morgan are asleep in my computer room.  We had a great day at the Uwin Park and what a surprise to Meet Mechial and Steve and Katie there,  The breeze was wonderful and it was a great plan Kim had.  Have not heard from Leah and Craig.  Hope all is well.

Plans for today are a little shopping and then meet at Sandra and Randy's for lunch.  I believe Theresa and Mikie will meet us there too.

Kim leaves to-night so that is sad the time has gone so fast.

Sunday message:  | Build up one another in love!

OLDER AND YOUNGER

                                                                    Our shade deck

Friday night Kim sat with dad and I out in our shade deck.  It was cooler and quieter there.  Dad has been out there today as it is far too hot now.  I should have cooled the house down better in the early morning because it feels warm now.  It seems far too warm to even  go over to the store and I really need to go.  I need to get things for the picnic to-morrow at the park.  My brain has very few ideas of what to get so that does not help.

Our plans changed with Jane as she was mixed up; I am glad I am not the only one, about the day and had other plans.  So we will have something to look forward to next week.

Dad seems to be feeling younger as he is walking better and I seem to be feeling old.  Yes, middle age looks good to me.  I am wondering what one should feel like when they are 75.  I lose my balance much easier and lose my thoughts too.  This is very annoying when I was thinking of something witty and profound to say and then it leaves me.

I am trying to do some helpful things to stop the aging process, like eating right and getting exercise.  I know the hot weather does not help but I feel very listless and indecisive.  Actually these feelings are not all that new to me when I stop to think about it.

It would be nice if we could view the world with rose coloured glasses but in fact is  it is better to be honest about how we are feeling.  I sure did not feel like cooking but dad did not feel like going out to eat.  We each made ourselves a sandwich.  He was perfectly happy sitting in his shade deck although it was pretty warm there too.  I joined him for a quiet day.

Theresa and Leanne came flying by to pick up Kim to go to a ladies stag.  They all looked so young and full of energy.  I could use a bit of that energy so I had a nap.

Today is picnic at Unwin Park after church.  Ben and Morgan are coming to stay the night. 

It is always wrong to compare ourselves with others.  I do my best with what I have been given, a few too many wrinkles, but it is what it is.  Reading about all the beautiful people in the world none of them seem happy.  I will determine to enjoy the life I have been given and know that there will always be challenges.  I know what it is like to be depressed and feel unhappy with myself part of it is our eternal makeup and some of it is our circumstances and some things are out of our control.

I have to work at accepting myself and my limitations.  I have to believe that I am worthy of being loved wrinkles and warts and all!  Being a little bit crazy helps!  Having a bit of faith helps too!

Having a shade deck and a husband is wonderful!