MULTIPLYING

Believe it or not my lady bugs are multiplyimg. They are very loving. I am happy when I see them on my roses.

It is raining pretty good here right now so wonder if dad will go for a walk to-day.

We did not drive over to Justice's birthday we were sorta a last minute invite. Port Moody is so far and driving in rush hour would not be fun. Sent Justice a card I was under the impression she had moved so I thought it was the wrong address. Tasha is going to have us all over for a barbie.

Had just the usual day, cut the lawn, pulled weeds, went to the library and to Value Village and bought some vases. Dad got a very smart sweater and I got high heels.
Certainly cannot wear them today I have a million things to do, inside and out!
Tried walking in them and I can't. How did I every do that?

No we would not drive to Mission for a lacrosse game.

I slept in today until 5:30 and put the picture on last night after an hour looking for it. It was on the news how they were spreading these lady bugs around town on the roses. I just happened to have my camera handy.

Today is undecided. The future of the church and Christianity is undecided too! There is no way that people will accept the reality of heaven and hell. Hell was not an influence in my life but heaven was certainly the place to be.

Socialism and market capitalism have failed and the drive for control of the oil is what drives power and is corrupting our world.

But there will always be those of us who are open to the spirit and there will be many paths this will lead to.

HEALING LOVE

My parents did not really encourage me to believe in God or in Jesus but I firmly believe that there is a childlike spirit within us that is drawn to believing in the message of love especially as spoken about in the spirit of Jesus. We find comfort in stories as we come across mean-spirited people in our lives; and I need God in my life just to talk to and believe in. Just like there are times we need a daddy or a mommy or a friend or our children. We find a song that can touch our spirits and for me a hymn or a word of scripture can do this too.

Animals can also be very important presence with us in times of grief and loneliness. God is for me a source of healing love; as a child I could see beyond myself into this other world. Children when I was small had lots of time to daydream and to wonder. As I grew older I realized that other people could have an influence on me and soon I realized that friends do not always support our spiritual growth and sometimes even bring a sense of unworthiness and insecurity.

There is a larger purpose in our lives than just to exist for ourselves. Even the intellectuals who write books like "The Evolution of God" will ad mitt to. No, I am not reading this book though I may because it is on my book ipod, put there by dad who is reading it. My spiritual growth has not always been welcomed or accepted by those nearest and dearest to me. Boyfriends are a major distraction when we feel like we have fallen in love!

I want to see the value of virtue that is spontaneous and free; not just a standard of right and wrong, but a growth of the soul to discover the inner strength we all were born with. I want to be free of an earthly or worldly identity that hides the spiritual identity of who I really am. I see myself as a little butterfly flying and hovering over the church services I attend; not becoming all that involved not not having to believe exactly as others do. This leaves me free to enjoy the beauty that surrounds me.

Today it looks rainy and after a walk I think we are going to a second hand store. I forget what we are looking for but maybe dad will remember. But first a little prayer time and another cup of coffee. I did not sleep that well, maybe too much chocolate cheese-cake. Very yummy!

ALL THINGS BRIGHT AND BEAUTIFUL

All things bright and beautiful
All creatures great and small
All things wise and wonderful
The Lord God made them all.

I wonder if Leah and Stephen and Oliver remember we use to sing this out of my little old hymn book? The children did attend church but now they do not. I feel sad about this because my faith has given me joy and courage and hope.

Psalm 8
O Lord, our Lord
how majestic is your name in all the earth!

You have set your glory above the heaven
from the lips of children and enfants you have ordained praise.. . . . .

What is man that You are mindful of him
the son of man that You care for him?

You have made him a little lower than the heavenly beings
and crowned him with glory and honor.

You have made him ruler over the works of Your hands
You put everything under his feet.

Mankind includes us all as equals.

BREATHE ON ME BREATH OF GOD

Be drawn into the sacredness of beauty and let each breath gently fill and renew you!


Breathe on me Breath of God
Fill me with life anew
That I may love what Thou dost love
And do what Thou wouldst do.

Breath on me Breathe of God
Till I am wholly Thine
Until this earthly part of me
Glows with Thy fire devine.

BECAUSE HE LIVES

Each tiny drop of rain stays gently on the petals of the flower.
The flower drinks and as I drink pure water I am reminded that I am drinbing life!
Because He lives I can face to-morrow!

Nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer to Thee!
Even though it be a cross
That raises me,
Still all my song would be,
Nearer my God to The

Though like a wanderer
the sun gone down
Darkness be over me
My rest a stone,
Yet in my dreams I'd be
Nearer mt God to Tee

Or if on joyful wing
cleaving the sky
Sun, moon and stars forgot,
upward I fly
Still all my song shall be
Nearer to Thee!
Hymn 321

FRIENDSHIP

This picture taken from my friend's home at Chelsy Gardens, is a place where we often walk together. I am very fortunate to have many good friends. Today I attended a funeral for our friend's mother. Judy's mom died after being paralyzed with a stroke a year and a half ago.

It brought back many painful memories for me sitting at mom's side holding her hand and talking to her with no response. She could move her right hand a bit and would wave good-bye when I left. I wish that I had said more at her funeral. I remember travelling to Calgary and not being able to sleep that night. Brian had volunteered to talk about her and I was just to add scripture verses.

I believe that the Psalms are truly beautiful and express all the human emotions from passion and love to fear and anger. Jesus also expressed all these emotions which makes him truly human. I like to believe that as he came face to face with people they could see the light of holiness burning in his eyes; and that he could see the soul of the person he was with. Thus he could see into the heart of the prostitute as well as into the heart of the scribes and Pharisees. He felt a legitimate anger at those who took from the poor and betrayed God by their actions.

I am also thinking of what readings I would choose.

Psalm 34
Iwill extol the Lord at all times
His praise will always be on my lips.
My soul will boast in the Lord
let the afflicted jear and rejoice
Glorify the Lord with me,
let us exalt His name foreve

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

A Hymn
For the beauty of the earth,
for the beauty of the skies
for the love which from our birth
over and around us lies
Lord of all, to Thee we praise
this our sacrifice of praise.

For each perfect gift of Thine
to our race so freely gives
Graces human and divine
flowers of earth and birds of heaven,
Lord of all to Thee we raise
This our sacrifice of praise.


Holy, holy holy, Lord God Almight
early in the morning our song shall rise to Thee
Holy, holy holy merciful and mighty
God in Three persons, blessed Trinity.


What a friend we have in Jesus
all our sins and griefs to bear
What a priviledge to carry
everything to God in prayer.

JUST YOU WAIT

Yes, that is what I would say to my children when I felt I was at the end of my rope! You were not listening to me and the four of you were noisy and messy and I did not know what else to do. You were always better for your dad and in many ways he was more relaxed; even if he did take care of you he was not handling washing and cleaning and cooking at the same time. I think now a days both parents are more involved and that is a blessing for mom and for the children.

The history of Christianity has been built on waiting. Waiting for a powerful end to the world as we know it and for goodness to overcome evil and for all people to live together in peace and plenty. This will take a cosmic catastrophe when the power of evil will be destroyed; and Christ will return on the clouds of heaven to complete the work of salvation.

The words of Jesus as written down for us support these claims as they were what people believed. Paul, who became a great teacher believed the end was coming. Even today as we look at all the disasters in the world we can believe that one day this world as we know it will collapse and be destroyed.

The church that started out in small groups came under the authority of Constantine so that there would now be no separation of church and state. Bishops, elder, deacons claim power and authority as they declared what was the correct teaching.

What then shall we believe? Who really wrote the gospels? The Old Testament belonged to the past to be replaced by the new vision of God. Jerusalem was declared a holy site which needed to be taken back by the real believers. The heavens opened up to reveal the sun as the center of our universe not the earth.

New knowledge in the realm of history and geography began to question the authority of the Bible. We now are living in an age where the Bible has been replaced all together. "Science and philosophy have together advanced reason as the primary mode for attaining truth and have, thereby, changed forever our understanding of the universe and of mankind." -The Future of Christianity. God is now no longer "up there" or even "out there."

Time for a change in the language of the church. People experience the presence of God within their souls and may be too embarrassed to share this experience. This changes deep feelings within and there is a desire to live out of the beauty of that moment, to find peace within and without.

I pray that there will be an openness to others who sense this conscious presence of God. I grew up in the church and my hope and prayer is that the church will realize how vulnerable it is and that the authority it once had it no longer has.

"The atheist staring from his attic window is often nearer to God than the believer caught up in his own false image of God." -- Martin Buber. It is time to stop making God in our own image!

DISCIPLINE

Streams are beautiful when they flow over the rocks and through the way already open by years of past sense of direction. We all know it is impossible for a stream to flow upstream and we know the power of water to create a way through and over the rocks.

Discipline is one of the lessons of life that is a practical tool but also a spiritual tool. The Buddhist tradition jokes about accepting the "embarrassment of being you" which allows us to be friendly to ourselves and not demand perfection; but also realize there are healthy ways to work towards change. Stopping the inner critical voice with flowing words of affirmation.
"Compassion begins with ones-self so it can flow freely to others."

Discipline means to live a balanced life of not over-eating, over-working, or even over-exercising, to conger our impulses and face and do not fear the uncomfortable.
Life does say "no" to us and it begins early in our childhood as a normal thing. I think it was easier for me to hear no because i heard it being said to my brother and he would challenge discipline. One advice I would give to parents is to continually affirm the good but be firm when you say no. Let your no mean no.

I am also reading about the important role genes play in cell-growth; and how undisciplined unrestrained cell grow can cause cancer. It is a disruption of DNA sequence. We are entering a time of discovery that is exciting and complex.

Cancer is a disease of the genome; which was caused by a gene that did not do its work of suppressor. A gene called p53 has been discovered and referred to as the "guardian of the genome". Normally p53 is activated when any damage is done to DNA, in order to stop the process of cell replication until the damage can be repaired.

Yesterday as I stopped to visit a lady, in a wheel chair smoking, the first thing she did is defend her smoking habit. She has had a stroke and has also broken her leg and is separated from being with her husband because of the care she needs. They are in their 60's. The need to smoke was greater than the need to be disciplined and suffer through the pain of withdrawal.

God also says no to many of our prayers and many doors are not only shut in our face they can be slammed shut. This is not a time to allow self-pity, or even feelings of unworthiness, to control our thoughts. The more I listen to the stories of others the more I am aware that we all have disappointments and failures and we can give in to our weaknesses or try to find new strength to cope.

A light misty rain is falling as our dear friends gather at a grave side service. We had prayed it would not rain but thankfully we all have umbrellas. The tears of heaven fall on this small group as they share their grief. God also shares with them.

My garden welcomes this refreshing rain. We need water we are being told. We need rain to keep our streams flowing and rain can wash away our tears.

HOPE

Each blade of grass has its Angel that bends over it and whispers,"grow, grow."
So do we. The Talmud.


I love these beautiful yellow roses and have brought several into the house to enjoy
1
This is the garden at Chalsea gardens where Shirley Fowller lives.

The beauty of spring fills us with hope!
I am not a natural born gardener like our daughter Sandra, in fact I do not know where she gets this creative energy from, but she creates beauty in abundance in her gardens.
I am fortunate that I have her help and in the fact that most plants love to grow and bloom. I never pour over gardening books or plan what I am planting. I am one of those people who forget to put on their gardening clothes and end up with dirty, broken nails. I pull up good flowers and let the weeds grow! But I have a colourful show all the same.

Is there hope for me Sandra?

I am so thankful that dad is doing so much better I believe it gives us all hope that we can improve!

PRAYERS

I am praying for some very difficult situations and feel the need to find assurance in my prayers. Scripture says God has put eternity in our hearts Ecclesiastes 3:3 and it helps me to be reminded that faith is a gift of God that he puts in our hearts as a part of the creation process. I have faith that prayers are thoughts that we put into words and create a deeper love for God, who listens, and for those we are praying for.

Last night as I asked for prayer for baby Elsie the friend who prayed had lost three small children herself and I never knew this about her. We knew as she prayed for healing there was also the reality this may not be meant to be. The parents will need strength and courage to live each day.

In our small group we had two people without jobs, one has found a job. Two people have just had their mother's died and another has his mother in critical condition.
One man has a serious heart condition and another couple have a daughter addicted to heroin. We talk about the sermon from the past week but then we pray. It is then the closeness to God becomes real.

I believe as each of us believe that His love is with us, in the love expressed in our prayers. Love that whispers in the wind, in the beautiful sounds the leaves make as a gentle breeze stirs the; in the storms of life and in the calm of a lake that seems to stretch forever. Nature heals and stirs our hearts to have faith in the unknown. God heals not because of our faith but because he has compassion and love for us all. God also grieves when we grieve and sharing with others helps lighten our loads.

"Do not be afraid, for I am with you," Genesis 26:24

We all have had people disappoint us and crush the very life out of our spirit but God is a healing presence that surrounds us and restores us and at times carries us.
We all carry grief but there is healing.

OLD- FASHIONED

As I sit and have a good old-fashioned cup of tea with Shirley we do a lot of talking about the good old days. We have great memories and many laughs as we share our past history. There is apart of me that will always be a bit old-fashioned.

I am now have a bite to eat because I cannot eat until after I have some blood tests in the morning. This is what happens when dad comes to the doctor and exaggerates! I am glad to have some pills which will help my digestion. Dad says he will come with me and we can go out for breakfast after I get drained of blood!

I guess it is good to have things checked.

NORMAL

Hmmmm well it is good that some one in our family feels normal.

I guess feeling nauseated a lot of the time is not normal but is it something one should bother the doctor with. I wonder. I think like most people I try to cope with discomfort but I am feeling more tired too and cranky so maybe it is time.

I think it is time for what has been normal in the church to look at changing. I see the cross as a symbol of the need to change, to risk and to grow. Hopefully the church can open its big doors that have shut out the world to let the spirit of honesty and compassion be the light for our way!

I have just been reading about the sex abuse in the Catholic church, and it is also in other places like schools and sports and even in families. It makes you sick just to read about it.

Now I am reading in the "Future of Faith" about two Catholic Priests; one Bishop Oscar Romero who was murdered for his compassion for the poor and Father Gutierrez who also served in an impoverished parish and wrote and taught about liberation theology. He also was drawn to Yves Congar's thinking on the theology of the laity.

I was prepared for but a little disappointed in Colebrooks decision to carry on as usual. I know it takes energy and commitment to even be willing to see the need of change.

Jesus spoke and lived out this need for change as he lived among and worked with the suffering and deprived. Not even death and defeat can prevent the coming of God's reign of justice.

"As Gutierrez writes; Reflection on the mystery of God [that is theology] can only be done by following Jesus. It is possible in this way and in this spirit to think about and announce the Father's gratuitous love for every human person."
The Future of Faith

Today we wait the news of a new baby being born to Mary's step-mom with prayer for both her and Mary who will be there as Ken is away working. The baby was expected to come a week earlier.

THERE IS A CHILL IN THE AIR

Our garden is looking very beautiful will all the flowers coming out and blooming so full of colour and all the different shapes and varieties. We have many places to sit and enjoy the gift of nature; but it has been too chilly and windy to even think about it. We will now have a real shady place to sit under the massive branches of the evergreen tree that Ben and Morgan are so excited about. It is almost like a tree fort. We do not see Ben and Morgan very much any more so we enjoy every moment of their visit. Dad played lacrosse with Ben at the tennis park and later I took them for a walk over to our nearest park.

It is hard to keep in touch with our grandchildren who are busy and scattered. We are looking forward to Ken coming in July and hopefully all our children will be able to get together. Also Kim is coming in July and we are excited about seeing her.

It seem chilly in Colebrook Church yesterday to me anyways. There were about half of the people away because of the long week-end but what a loving group of people.
It was so good to see a friend who we had been praying for out of hospital and recovering her health. There were those who were grieving and those who were celebrating and in a small church you are very aware of this.

Douglas Todd in the Vancouver Sun writes about evolution being in the air. "Psychologists maintain evolution is the key to human development".
We are being called to embrace creative transformation and "each of us is being asked to contribute to the ongoing evolutionary process. One of my concerns is that we live in a throw-away society where we always demand bigger and better material goods. We have many choices right now but in the future we may not have a choice in our lifestyle. Water among other things may be in short supply.

When I think of the future I do feel a chill in the air aware that all change comes with some benefit but also at great cost. Can we avoid global disaster? We see major disasters going on in our world all around us. The amazing thing is that there is always a fighting spirit that brings us together as people help other people. We live in a troubled and violent world just like the world which gave birth to Christianity. Yesterday we remembered the day of Pentecost when the Holy Spirit blew new life into a group of praying and waiting believers. They then went out to change the world having to face great changes in their own hearts and souls.

Today we will be enjoying Randy cooking supper for us as we visit with him and Sandra. It is these precious moments that renew us and continue to give us hope.

TWO SLEEPY PEOPLE

In humbleness, be like the earth!

In tolerance for those who do you ill, be like a gentle breeze!

In generosity for everyone, be like the sea!

In compassion for others
And especially for yourself
Be like the sun!
A Sufi Mystic

Never forgetting we breathe the same air!


I enjoy keeping in touch on face book but I appreciate face to face relationships.
I find that in a community of like minded people there is healing for brokenness, a joy in spirituality, a desire to learn and explore, and a concern for those around me.


Creativity
"Creativity asks us, in the midst of the contrariety's of daily living, to believe that there are new possibilities out there,
to loosen our control,
and to take more risks, to let life unfold."
Catholic Priest and yoga instructor Thomas Ryan in his book Soul Fire.

ALTRUISM

Dawkins, the writer of "The God Delusion" makes some interesting points even though in my opinion he repeatedly mischaracterizes faith, argues that there is a gene and its relentless drive for survival that explains the existence of all living things and he argues we humans are at last far enough to be able to rebel again est our genetic imperatives. It is true that science cannot prove or disprove God to those who do not want to find Him. God is not on trial and if one tries like I did to read the book "God is Dead" each story is totally depressing as life becomes not worth living.

Why do most of us value altruism? Dawkins writes "We can even discuss ways of deliberately cultivating and nurturing pure, disinterested altruism--something that has no place in nature [disagree] something that has never existed before in the whole history of the world" [disagree]. What he seems to be saying is that we do good deeds out of a desire for reward and this is the morality of Christianity.

C. S. Lewis writes "If there was a controlling power outside the universe, it could not show itself to us as one of the facts inside the universe-no more than the architect of a house could actually be a wall or staircase or fireplace in that house. The only way in which we would expect it to show itself would be inside ourselves as an influence or a command trying to get us to behave in a certain way. And that is just what we do find inside ourselves. Surely this ought to arouse our suspicions?"

In the end can faith in God seem more rational than disbelief? Faith does not demand proof but is open to the possibility of a spiritual reality that is bigger than us and yet lives within us. There are good and caring people all around us and we can believe in all different facets of the truths. Faith will conflict with reality when we read stories of the horror in places like the refuge camp in the North Darfar region of the Sudan. God remains hidden in the violence of death and hatred. God also remains hidden in our affunence.

TEARS OF JOY AND TEARS OF SADNESS.

The moonlight on this rose was breathtaking but my camera insisted on adding light so the flash kept going off. I find in life we often feel mixed emotions like saying good-bye at the airport to Carol and Panteli happy they are happy and having this adventure to China but sad to see them go away.

Theresa showed us her video of the proposal that she took pictures of at a special restaurant. The young man was nervous as he came in to present the beautiful roses to his lovely girlfriend and then before she could caught her breath he dropped to his knees to ask her to marry him and give her a beautiful ring. This special moment was captured for them to treasure forever.

The knights in the stories of merry old England performed challenging each other on horse back with great swords while a beautiful princess watched. If he was lucky he would win the competition and also the maiden.

Love is a beautiful thing that brings us joy and heartache. The young waitress asked how we had stayed married for so many years. For me it was a strong sense of commitment that we make in the old wedding vows; in sickness and in health, in richness's and in poverty [something like that.]

Your dad is full of stories where he risked his life to save someone in a ditch, or in the water, or in a snowstorm and I admire his courage and love to hear the stories.
Getting up with your children and sitting by their bed all night does not seem very thrilling but taking care of our small children was a heroic task in a different light. All men seem to get caught up in their work and often it is not until later they realize what they have missed in their children's lives. It appears to a young wife and mother that the romance has gone when, life takes so much energy and time doing what needs to be done.

We all need moments of pure romance. I treasure these moments in our lives. I am glad we can now do many things together and appreciate the good qualities that have always been there but we may have lost sight of.

CONTROVERSY

Which came first the chicken or the egg? Which is right science or religion? As we are able to examine the universe above us and within us with the powerful magnifying microscope and the telescope it is time to let go of blind faith and welcome new discoveries. Galileo who was put under house arrest for his publications of his scientific research has said. "I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to fore go their use."

"What are we to make of those restless hearts who deny His [God's] existence". Disbelief can be a form of rebellion against the church and the government. Sigmund Freud argued that belief in God was just wishful thinking. Most of all the theory of evolution has been further proof against a Creator. Can theology survive? Is Dawkin's right when he states that faith is one of the world's great evils, greater than the treat of AIDS or Mad Cow etc. We have no need of God he states, Religion is anti rational and can be classified as blind trust. I disagree on both these points because I feel we need God for moral guidance, to discern right and wrong. I believe that a belief in God can be intellectual and rational as we become serious in our thinking. Yes, religion has done evil and we have to take responsibility for that damage. But there have been many good things like schools and hospitals and soup kitchens that feed and clothe the hungry.

It all comes down to which of man's reasoning's we CHOOSE to believe. Atheism and agnosticism cannot prove or disprove the existence of a divine power or source.

The question is how can be stop the inhumanity of man to man? We humans are causing suffering to others with our greed and our pride and our selfishness. The fist followers of Jesus were called Followers of the Way which was a way of compassion and generosity and healing that would bring in a way of peace and plenty for all.

TRAIL AND ERROR

My computer is acting very, very strangely. Maybe because of the wind I really do not know. Everything seems to be by trial and error. Mostly error.

I am trying some new bread to see if it makes a difference in how I feel. I am giving in to dad's nagging that I go to the doctor and he [the doctor] better act pleased to see me or else. This is the grouch in me that has decided to express it's miserableness.

Dad drove to White Rock which was good as I was feeling a little dizzy. Then after filling my basket with goodies we met Jane and Geof for coffee at Starbucks. Home to have a nap and get in the mood for Gracelyn's 16th birthday. Why can I never find scotch tape when I need it. O well dad says it does not matter as he sits watching the hockey game. It will be a fun and noisy party which makes us feel happy to be there. We will receive a warm welcome as a part of their family.

Tomorrow we pick up Carol and Panteli to take them to the airport. Theresa, Ben and Morgan may drive in from Chilliwack to see them before they go. I hate saying good-bye to people and so many of our family are scattered here and there.

Trail and error also happens in scientific research as described by a researcher in Genetics named Francis S. Collins. He began studies of the D.N.A. code in which are several hundred letters. He studied the production of just one protein, found in red blood cells, of the human fetus in utero. This protein is called hemoglobin and it allows red blood cells to deliver oxygen from our lungs to all the rest of the body. Humans and some apes use a special version of hemoglobin before birth that helps extract oxygen from the mother's blood to nourish the growing fetus. During the first year of life this fetal hemoglobin turns off. However, in further study a Jamaican family continued to carry quantities of this into adulthood. It took eighteen months to discover a G instead of a C of one of the genes that triggered fetal hemoglobin production. Even 20percent of fetal hemoglobin would eliminate
sickle cell disease.

A study was undertaken to characterize and estimate how many genes the genome might contain. Protein-coding regions of genes are interrupted by intervening DNA segments called introns. "Despite all these uncertainties, there was no question how valuable a complete genome sequence would be. He would lead a team to pursue the genetic basis of certain diseases. Foremost was cystic fibrosis. Steady improvements in managing symptoms-replacing enzymes in the pancreas, treating lung infections with better antibiotics and improving nutrition and physical therapy-gradually extended the life of CF patients.

One letter in the 3 billion letters of the DNA code going wrong caused illness.

We all have two copies of each gene, one inherited from Mom and one from Dad. Both copies of the gene are faulty then there is trouble. An exhaustive study continued; in a search to find a disease gene by progressively narrowing its chromosomal position. When CF researchers and families and clinicians gather ed celebrat a breakthrough there was great rejoicing.

Critics would say :geneticists would be wading through a sea of drivel to emerge dry shod on a tiny island of information." Studies would be costly and extremely time consuming. He would become involved with the Human Gnome Project.

"As a believer in God, was I being called to take on a larger role in a project that would have profound consequences for our understanding of ourselves?" On June 26 the first draft of the human instruction book had been determined and he named it the language of God. "This book was written in the DNA language by which God spoke life into being. A modern understanding of science can be harmonized with a belief in God."

Support was being found for Darwin's theory of evolution. We human beings may share a common ancestor with other human beings Yes, evolution is only a theory but the discoveries of science are important in our understanding of faith in God.

WINDY NIGHT

The pond is still working this morning. What a kind thing the young man did to save the baby raccoons, putting them on a heating pad outside the roof, after chasing mom out with a hockey stick, and shutting the roof closed. I was wondering where they went last night.

Yes, I am late this fine morning after a sleepless night. The branches of the tree hitting our window; which I was sleeping through, until dad woke me up to look out the window. But we are fortunate to have one another so I am not really complaining but it does amaze me how he can go right back to sleep while I lay there listening.

My computer decided to shut me out this morning and I was starting to wonder if dad had changed my password as he did his. Because I could not get on I went to face book and read about Ben's head injury so back to prayer time. Theresa hit his head as she was closing the trunk after lacrosse practice. Accidents happen so darn fast and it happens to the best of parents. I think of the time I was running across the road the Kim fell and cut her lip and knocked out the tooth. I remember how bad I felt for her.

Today I am heading down to Choices to buy some brown rice buns to eat instead of my new flax bread just to see if this new bread may be causing me some nausea. Meeting Jane there for coffee. Dad is starting a new project making a new porch under the tree. Looks like a tree house and should be cute. I am so glad he feels like doing these building things again.

I am reading about the early history of the Christian Church and how quickly it changed from a Jesus movement that was fueled by faith and love into a religious empire controlled by priests [men] and prescribed doctrines of belief. Jesus who welcomed women to follow him as I believe as equals would not be happy with the birth of a new religion.

The church now is facing difficult times and will continue to do so unless it changes. Sadly the intellectuals have taken over and the message of love and acceptance has been clouded by the demand that we "believe right". I was caught up in the words that I was hearing especially about the inspiration of scripture but now I think that if humans are involved at all they have a slanted viewpoint from which they operate and try to lead others.

I have held many positions in the church and have even given sermons at the Vineyard and at the United Church. I think I spoke from my heart with the knowledge I had at the time. Religion is now being replaced with spirituality that is much freer and open to the wind of the spirit.

We talked in home church about our own journey of faith and how we are all different; we mentioned people in our lives who had touched us with their faith and helped us on our way. Your dad attended school because he was forced to to play hockey and his coach was the teacher. All he heard was a bunch of stories that did not impact his life. I loved going to Sunday school where Jesus was very real to me. There was no teaching on letting Jesus into your heart that I remember but I just knew he loved me. We sang it and my heart believed it!

So now we are this small group of people who meet to read scripture, discuss the message from the sermon and from scripture, and try to make it real in our own lives. Lots of laughter and grace. We end with prayer and thankfulness.

NOT SO CUTE

Our neighbors have discovered a not so "cute" raccoon in their attic. They may look cute but evidently they are very destructive and annoying. They rip off the shingles and make a nest in your attic. There they have babies and are impossible to get rid of without the experts. If they die in your attic or in your heating duct the smell is atrocious. They ate all our fish in our pond and have again distroyed the hose that keeps the water flowing. They have dug up all the lawns in the neighborhood to get at the grubs and it has been a sorry sight.

Should we feed them?

I have just been praying for people on our prayer lists with very grave problems. A tiny little baby with a very serious infection, a child with leukemia and another that needs a serious operation for internal displacement of organs and many other illnesses.

Life can be annoying but the health and well-being of our children and grandchildren is really what matters. I am so happy with ALL our family!

This morning is a nice morning to walk down to Zellers with dad. I am so happy he can now do some walking and so we can go together. Sometimes we have to make choices and I will miss the U.C.W. outing but I know they will have a grand time!

WORK

My walk on a rainy day. I love umbrella's but wear water proof pants and jack et instead. I asked if I could take her picture but I do not think she heard me.

I am finding trying to keep this garden in reasonable shape is taking a lot of hard work. I love seeing the flowers blooming and I know that as people walk by they admire and appreciate the beauty. So the good is that the hard work does produce good results. I am quite in favor of a few rainy days to do the watering for me even though I know the weeds will also grow among the roses.

Faith also takes work as I cultivate a new heart and a softer attitude. If I want this world to be a place of peace I have to have a peaceful attitude towards life.
Jesus spoke about the Kingdom of God that was peace that would bear good fruit like patience and kindness, compassion and grace; not striving for power and giving in to evil desires.

The truth is that Jesus has affected the beliefs of many religions
"Hindus understood him as avatar
Buddhists as a bodhisattva
Both Muslims and Jews as a prophet of God
Even agnostics find something fascinating and admirable in him."
"The Future of Faith" by Harvey Cox.

Jesus had to face the opposition of corrupt authorities even in his own religion. He spoke words of living hope to those whose lives were crushed by hopelessness. He calls us to believe in the unbelievable. Hearts that ache and long for what cannot be will find strength and courage to cope with daily work of planting seeds of peace among those we live and work with.

The life of Jesus takes us from his birth in a simple place to unmarried peasants who felt their lives threatened; through his years of teaching and preaching what he called good news, to the end of his life where he boldly confronted evil where ever it was destroying the lives of people even finding it in the religious priests and the temple with it's demands and sacrifices. All that he experienced made him who he was. As all that we experience influence who we become.

I am reading more and more about the need for churches to change yet there is so much resistance.

"The Spirit blows where it will" Jesus denied that the spirit is to be contained only in believers. This is the spirit that lives on after the death and resurrection of Jesus. This is the spirit that unites instead of dividing. This is the spirit of peace that is blowing upon us all.

As I start out in the morning to walk or to work in the garden I welcome the fresh air into my lungs with renewed energy.

SEPARATION

We are separated by miles of ocean from Matthew and baby Jasmine.

Jesse waits with his brothers as they fly back to Brisbane.

Separation is a part of life that brings a sadness that is always there. Brittany has a visit with her new baby sister.

Sandra will be driving back from Edmonton today after a visit with Cameron and his new girl friend Chantel, and Sephen and Shawna. On the way there she had Mary, her daughter for company, and I know the feelings she will be having in leaving them all.

It is a happy time when families can be together Lucas was happy to see his daddy when he visited in Trinidad. Hopefully he will come to visit us here in the near future.

We are happy and excited for Carol and Panteli moving from their home in Tsawwassen to a place near or in Chilliwack. We will miss the visits we had in their home their and hope they can find a good home to move to.

"The Danish philosopher Soren Kieregaard [1813-55] once remarked that as soon as we are old enough to look around, we find ourselves on a ship that has already been lauched." The beginning of our lives shape our language, our cultural awareness and our sense of identity. As we grow more mature we start to ask questions and find out there are not always answers.

In the stories of Jesus there are the times he spent on the water in a boat with his disciples. Both in the time he comes to them from the shore and when he was asleep in the boat with them they experience very storm rough seas. Their faith is shaken and they are filled with fear. The presence and the words of Jesus calm their fears.
On my vogage which began with Jesus I have gone through stormy seas and times when I felt the sadness of separation.

Different religions are like people finding themselves in different boats, believing what they are being taught. I, like, everyone else have discovered that hidden in the mystery of unanswerable questions, there will always be a "boat" beneath me that will always be there and will always be apart of my journey.

If I look at the Ols Testament as a story that begins with creation and ends with calling the universe to seek peace and healing and justice. We live in a world of unfulfilled potential where there is a special place for us.

I have watched my family sail off in their own little boats and my love goes with them. Separation is sadness but it is also necessary for growth.

HERO

Ben is our little hero because he tries so hard and has fun.

The Vancouver Sun talks about past hero's like Superman in the pursuit of justice and truth and the everyday hero that is portrayed as helping others When we feel we are correcting a wrong or lending a hand to someone in need we may not feel like a hero but we feel good inside.

It is good to play team sports because a big part of life is our interpersonal relationships. I often find myself wanting to withdraw but then this is better than having to dominate or control. We all have needs and wants and it is very spiritual to recognize what they are and how they can be met or not met.

For me there is a security that I call "soul security" that flows out of the love I have for Jesus as a friend and as a guide and as one who lights my way.

DREAMING

I did not dream that I would like lacrosse but the children both girls and boys had fun playing this game.

This is the back of the house I liked best.

How does this caterpillar change into a beautiful, graceful butterfly.
It goes to sleep and while it is dreaming the change happens.
How does faith grow out of a dream that encompasses all the mysteries of life that we cannot grasp?

"The most beautiful emotion we can experience is the mysterious"
Albert Einstein.

We all have our dreams that fill our hearts with hope and passion and love.
We dream of a better world where peace and contentment are our goals.

As long as we can dream and follow our hearts desire for all that is good for all there will be hope.

CHAIRS SIT IN THE BACK YARD ALL READY FOR US.

I DREAM OF A SMALLER HOUSE WHERE BEN AND MORGAN COULD VISIT but that does not mean that I am not completely happy here because I am.

DAD AND CAROL HAVE FOUND A DREAM HOME


MORGAN LOOKS FOR NUMBERS ON THE DOORS

BEN DREAMS OF SCORING A GOAL

LOOK FOR THE BUBBLES!

Trying to blow bubbles for Matthew and Jasmine did not work and even trying to take pictures they do not show up that well. But I had fun doing it and this is one of the joys of being a great-grandma

Happy Birthday Cam! Hope you get time to visit with your mon and sister Mary, I hear the party is on Sunday and Stephen will be there. Good!

VISIONS

Many people like Mother Teresa, Gandhi, Nelson Mendala lived out the vision of wholeness that Jesus taught; that in loving others and emptying our lives out we are meeting the needs of the world which is love. Do what you do with love in your heart.

All ground is holy ground when we seek to live simply, to live responsibly and to serve and reach out to others. Over the years I have seen many changes and I know that ahead there are even more. I am becoming aware of the self-destructive philosophy that translators of the Bible have created by separating the soul within us from our divine image in which we were created. We see the image of the family shattered as separation from the source of life became a demanding figure of God who would only be appeased by sacrifices. I think the one brother probably told the other his sacrifice was no good. Brothers competing. I am just thinking as I am typing so I will correct this later. I am also trying to clean the outside windows which the sun is now shining through all the dusty dirt. I am not good at window cleaning.

I am now reading about the "Future of Faith" by Harvey Cox and finding it very helpful. The lines between the religious and the spiritual are softning and we carry our beliefs lightly where ever we go. People are being drawn to churches to become apart of home groups where friendships are valued and spirituality deepened.

More people are being drawn to the experiential in the charismatic and the Asia practices. In India and Japan Catholic monks sit cross-legged practicing Asian spiritual disciplines. Benedictine monks are now teaching laypeople "centering prayer" once view with distrust by the church.

Spirituality is a prostest against the legalism of religion with its fear and predjudice.

Spirituality values the awe and wonder of life and nature that awakens the soul and I know I want to respond in thankfulness.

Spirituality is moving from the Age of Belief to the Age of the Spirit. I enjoy the freedom of expressing my faith in many ways.

Fundamentalisum is slowly fading from its position that there are theological beliefs on which there have been no compromise. I have lived and experienced the different approaches and time and time again I come back to simply wanting to follow Jesus. I have learned through my journey into many different churches and now I am seeing what has to be left behind. Faith and belief are two entirely different words.

'FAITH IS ABOUT DEEP SEATED CONFIDENCE."

"BELIEF IS MORE LIKE AN OPINION."

Both can hold an emotional intensity and both contribute to the choices we make in life. We are now separating the two.

"If we love God, even though we think He soesn't exist, He will make his existence manifest." writes Simone Weil. Love and faith are both more primal than belief.

Maybe we are being offered another chance to "harvest the energies of love" as Tellhard de Chardin says.

Hatred does not cease with hatred, but only by love; this is the eternal rule.

Christianity began as faith in the words of Jesus as a prophet, a healer and a teacher of everyday reality. Then it was turn into the age of Belief. An elite group was formed called ministers and priests who started laying down rules and regulations that defind who was a Christian and who was not. This has been going on for fifteen hundred years since Constantine.

We are now making a rough passage into the age of the Spirit. Each of us has the potential to be in touch with the spirit of God in whatever place or form that takes.
I know that many dislike the sacraments and rituals that the priestly perform. The spirit as the Bible says "blows where it will" and cannot be contained. Pentecostals have stressed this direct experience of the Spirit and they welcome the presence of the Spirit into their worship.

There have been mystics through out time that have had powerful experiences of the Spirit. Even the German pastor Dietrich [1881-1995] Bonhoeffer wrote wistfully from his Gestapo cell of what he called a future "religiousless Christianity".

Today our young people are questioning everything and everyone and finding good people to put their faith into hard to find. Words and actions need to flow together to be believable.
Buddha

Love opens the spiritual door to the truth that compassion is to be our goal.

"We work our whole lives building our lives, and to what end?
I believe it is, finally, to give it away to others.
By this means our life becomes a seed.
Planted in the imagination of one who is ready to receive it, harbour it, nourish it, the seed becomes the life of the future."
-Hazel Parcells, Live Better Longer.
by Joseph Dispenza.

RESPONSIBILITY

"Behold I am doing a new thing. . . .
I am making a way in the desert
and streams in the wasteland." Isaiah 43:18

This is the time of year when we see signs of new life in nature all around us; and we are reminded that we have a responsibility to the earth to keep it healthy and productive.We have a personal responsibility to care for those we are near to and to live out what I want everyone in the world to do. Ethical behavior calls for respect, generosity, compassion and kindness, peace and humility. I cannot be responsible for the whole of humanity but neither can I float above it and ignore what is going wrong.

I am responsible for my own health and happiness and being aware of my needs emotionally as well as spiritually and physically help me to receive the love that I was created for. There are reasons beyond our understanding for why we are the way we are. Our cells carry memories that we are not aware of and yet they are a part of who we are. There is a gift that God would give to each one of us and that is His Love for us that is our mystical inheritance. This becomes new to us in the wonder of nature that can take our breath away. A sunset, a mountain, a flowing stream, a beautiful flower touch something deep within us and I have felt the serenity of unconditional love and the peace that passes understanding.

William James, the father of American psychology and author of "The Varieties of Religious Experience" tells us that the first characteristic of mystical experience is ineffability-it cannot be explained -it is a state of feeling-a memory that lingers within us.

I have a responsibility to care for and to have a reverence for all life.

"If humankind would accept and acknowledge this responsibility and become creatively engaged in the process of evolution [as co creators] consciously as well as unconsciously a new reality would emerge and a new age could be born."
-Jonas Salk

We are all one and we are all a part of a vast cosmic whole.

I love the story of the researcher looking into the healing experiences of those who were healed at Lourdes. He reported that the common element in the miracles, at the moment of cure, the person receiving the spontaneous healing was praying for someone else.

"Son, you are always with me, and everything I have is yours." Luke 15.

Teachers like Joel Goldsmith invite us to become aware of the mystic within. He wrote about the Infinite Way that is a walk of grace and blessing.

DETACHMENT

I love to listen to the pond bubbling away and the birds singing as I wash the windows. The birds are nesting in our little bird house again. I am also praying for those who are on our prayer list with extremely difficult health problems. From a month old baby to a 90 year old it is a blessing to be able to support them in my heart with prayer. The source of all life gives to each one of us continually and we then have the privilege of sharing.

I am trying to be healthy but also to enjoy life. One way to do this is to keep life simple and to be able to cultivate a spirit of detachment.

Calvinism and capitalism have been mixed together to create our obsession for self-improvement, so that we can be "saved". Detachment goes against this striving that continually makes us unsatisfied. As I look around my home I see many extra things that I do not really need. There are objects that I do not need just to be comfortable but I also know that beauty brings joy to the soul helping us to transcend beyond materialism.

I know there are times when I buy impulsively without stopping to think whether it is necessary. The culture in which I am living seems to encourage this. I have an attachment to values I have picked up over my lifetime; some of these are emotional. I can become attached to my resentment and anger even though I know forgiveness sets me free. Negative feelings are toxic and can make us sick.

I am working at not being attached to material things or the opinions of others. I am also finding I need to let go of spiritual attachments to religious beliefs and dogma that have been passed down through church teachings. I have a difficult time letting go of sacred texts that have in the past influenced my life. This does not mean that I cannot find inspiration in what I am reading and studying.

I have much to learn about detachment!

JOY

It is hard to believe our daughter Carol is a grandmother.
What joy being grandparents has brought into our lives.
Now it continues with Morgan and Ben our greatgrandchildren!

SMILE

I know it is good to take natural pictures and sometimes they work out pretty good!

HEALTHY

Using my new garden tools to plant some seeds.


I am thankful for all the creative ways to find wholeness and healing. There have been many discoveries in the field of medicine and I am reminded that it is good to work with the doctor to try and prevent illness and to cure sickness and pain. I am taking some herbal "Intestinew" which promises to support a healthy intestinal lining. I would like to have more energy and to be free of nausea; so I will try this and see.

I believe that being healthy spiritually is good but I also must be emotionally and mentally and physically healthy. There needs to be a balance that restores strength and healing in all areas.

Yesterday I got busy working and making about in the yard so it was hard to stop and get cleaned up to go out for lunch. Our Bible study group was having a wind up lunch at the new White Spot. Once I got there I was glad I had made the effort. On the way home stopped in for a short visit with Shirley. We got talking about childhood experiences, some disappointmments but we felt they made us better people in the end.

AUTHENTIC

As I enjoy the morning sunshine I see the dust and dirt that has collected on my windows through which the sun is shining. I can still see the beauty outside but I am distracted by the film that makes things seem dim. I look for authentic spiritual truth but am distracted by harsh reality and literal religious thought.
I see that I need to be set free from slavery to the past, to risk going through the sea, to reach a land of promise. I can read the old stories without getting drawn into arguing over facts. This allows the story of the parting Red Sea and the escape of the ancient Hebrews to have a deeper meaning.

I am discovering in Jesus a mystical reality that awakens the imagination through stories and parables that are authentic. We may question the words of Jesus but just like a story stays with us I believe that those who heard and listened with their hearts and minds would have a lasting memory.

Jesus was a Jew who had heard stories like the Passover repeated over and over again. He started questioning as a young boy visiting the temple discussing with the wise the mysteries of faith.

PRECIOUS MOMENTS

Time goes by so very quickly as we enjoy having Mary here for a visit. We all had so much to talk about as we visited together at the park. It is amazing to see our grandchildren become so mature and so delightful and fun to be with.

We were very fortunate to have such a perfect day for a picnic. Mikie's parents joined with us and we learned that they are now facing health problems as so many things had happened in their lives since we last talked to them.

Ben and Morgan enjoyed playing and climbing over the playground equipment. It was fun keeping an eye on them and seeing how they amused themselves; while we sat around eating and talking.

Visiting with Mary the following day was precious time as we learned more about her and Michael John and what they are doing and their future plans. They were very sad to have to put to sleep one of their little kittens. I know the feeling of unbelief that comes when you no longer have the presence of an animal that you have gotten use to. We still expect to see them.

My prayers go with Mary and her mom as they drive the long road through the mountains to Edmonton.

Carol and Panteli are going through the stress of selling their home so it was a good time for Carol just to get away and forget all that had to be done and trying to think of where they would live in the future.