MIXED EMOTIONS

                                             There is not much in life that is black and white.
                                                 Any day can contain a micture of emotions.

The last time we had visited Vera she had been sleeping so we had a short visit with Lorraine her daughter.  This morning we got a call from her daughter wanting to know exactly when we would be arriving.  It had been agreed previosly that coming at 11 would be a good time.  She wanted to know if this was still okay,  It almost seemed like she was saying not to come.

We start out with mixed emotions.  We arrive and she is lying down but not asleep and Lorraine has left to take care of fiances with her brother.  We drive in just as they leave the parking lot.  It seems she wanted us to come when she would be away.

Vera is not doing well.  She admitts her mind is foggy with all the medication she is on now.  At least it is controlling the pain but her personality has changed.

She seems to enjoy our visit but we can tell it is an effort for her to talk.

We leave with sadness in our hearts, tears in our eyes and not knowing if this will be our last visit with her.  She wonders why it is taking so long.

We come home and make some sandwiches together and dad makes coffee for us both.I fall asleep watching T.V. and my cup falls and I am started awake.    It was empty so that was good.

I spill enough stuff on me when I am alert.

Dad is now off on a bike ride and I will do a little in the garden and finish my mystery.  At least read one more chapter.

Life is a precious gift of time but there comes a time when life draws to a close.  In life as in death we are not alone.

Mohandas Granhi  said that physical death is the birth of spiritual life.

I pray for Vera it will be a peaceful transition, a time of surrender

Her love will live on in her family and in our hearts.