We came home from our party at Sandra and Randy's where we enjoyed time with Mary and Michael John and a surprised visit from Cameron here from Edmonton with his dad moving furniture. Cameron has found a new love and it would be wonderful if this develops into a lasting relationship.
We arrived home and I had to ruch into the bathroom while dad got all the garbage sorted to be put out. Then we noticed the red light blicking. A thank you message from Jane, she does not sound well at all. Then the next message is from Matthew crying his wee heart out and dad and I had tears in our eyes.
We will miss so much with Matthew growing up so far from us all. We could hear Ken's voice in the background so we know he would soon receive what he was crying for.
We have cried many tears over all our children and grand children and the great ones too. As young parents we loved each child with all our hearts as we held them close to our hearts. We still love them more than words can say. We know that we cannot make them happy but they do so many things that bring happiness into our lives.
I am learning to live with my past mistakes as they become like the "friendly ghost" who comes to haunt me at times and the old sad memories come back; but now I shew it away. Now is now and to be spiritual is according to the Buddists is to live in the moment. Beneath all our fronts, the face we put on, all of us carry the sadness of loss and a sense of incompleteness.
Every day for me seems to take every ounce of energy I have. I know what exhaustion feels like and how hard it is to live with. Dad, is just feeling this now after having so much energy and wanting to be busy with new challenges; always willing to take risks.
My faith is like a magical awareness into this fantasy world of the enchanted forest where the light shines upon me and all my tears are wiped away by the presence of Jesus. Prayer opens the door and Jesus is there to greet me.
Imagination is a great gift that takes us from the cruelness of life into a place of beauty!
We arrived home and I had to ruch into the bathroom while dad got all the garbage sorted to be put out. Then we noticed the red light blicking. A thank you message from Jane, she does not sound well at all. Then the next message is from Matthew crying his wee heart out and dad and I had tears in our eyes.
We will miss so much with Matthew growing up so far from us all. We could hear Ken's voice in the background so we know he would soon receive what he was crying for.
We have cried many tears over all our children and grand children and the great ones too. As young parents we loved each child with all our hearts as we held them close to our hearts. We still love them more than words can say. We know that we cannot make them happy but they do so many things that bring happiness into our lives.
I am learning to live with my past mistakes as they become like the "friendly ghost" who comes to haunt me at times and the old sad memories come back; but now I shew it away. Now is now and to be spiritual is according to the Buddists is to live in the moment. Beneath all our fronts, the face we put on, all of us carry the sadness of loss and a sense of incompleteness.
Every day for me seems to take every ounce of energy I have. I know what exhaustion feels like and how hard it is to live with. Dad, is just feeling this now after having so much energy and wanting to be busy with new challenges; always willing to take risks.
My faith is like a magical awareness into this fantasy world of the enchanted forest where the light shines upon me and all my tears are wiped away by the presence of Jesus. Prayer opens the door and Jesus is there to greet me.
Imagination is a great gift that takes us from the cruelness of life into a place of beauty!
3 comments:
So Matthew called you up to cry? Did you find out why he was crying?
When you started out with running to the bathroom, I thought, oh no, not again, not like last time you both got sick here. It was a very early start at our house this morning. I got up at 4am to take Cam to his dads truck, and when I got back Randy was up with the coffee perking! I am sure if I would have been another minute he would have had my cerial in my bowl and flowers on the talbe too.
Speaking of regretts, that is why I love the movie "Its a Wonderful Life" so much. You just cant do the what if game, this is your life and chances are it is the right one. Lets hope!
Sandra
Yes, that is one of my favorite films. I changed the front title to happiness.
To-morrow I am thinking about broken hearts. Like! we never been there! Love mommy
Matthew was crying because he wanted to speak to Grandma : or just eat the phone , either way he stopped crying when I gave him the phone.
Ken
Post a Comment