UNDECIDED

Finally found my more recent pictures.

Morgan is undecided should she touch or not,

I am undecided if I should continue my morning drivel. I love when it stirrs up a response and I love writing what is on my heart and mind but I am feeling undecided.

There are a lot of trees in the woods and everyone has it's own beauty. From the small to the giant we need them all. There are a lot of words in the world. My concern is that I am saying the same thing over and over.

I treasure moments like this.

I had a bad dream last night but was up the usual time.

I could not get the picture to go on.

It is an old picture because I couldn't get the up -to date one ones to appear. They were lost in that strange computer world that at times seems to want to control my world. For me the right picture is important.

I know I should do it right but sometimes the computer just won't work.

My dream was about all these people coming into the room I was in. More and more family and friends. I did not know what to do with everyone. I kept saying I cannot fed you and I do not have beds for you all. I was frantic because we were all so crowded. Then I looked outside and all these very ugly and evil people were running around the outside of the room; trying to get in. I was yelling at them to leave. I felt I had to keep everyone safe because something very bad was going to happen.

Anyway I am reading about the healing power of dreams. Somehow there is a part of me that I connect to only in my dreams. Sometimes I feel I know what the dream is revealing but other times I do not have a clue. "We over rationalize and become overbalanced and dreams will try to correct this." We experience stress and anxiety in giant size in our dreams that remind us of our lostness and brokenness. Everyone in my dream may be me but there is always the sense of great aloneness. I need to recover the sense of loss that getting old and feeling useless can unbalance me. I need to feel connected spiritually.

"Dreams come from a very deep and personal part of us and when we share our dreams we are sharing a huge part of who we are."

Anyway I managed to get through to dad's doctor and got him an appointment to get his should x-rayed. He gets results on Thrus. To-morrow, this is Monday night I am writing, we go to the eye-doctor. We are both tired and dad is having pain and feeling unhappy about not being ble to "do" things. I wish I had more energy but if I use it to pray then at least I am :doing" something that I believe is worthwhile.