OUR FIRST DATE

On our first date dad and I  drove around Saskatoon and looked at the Christmas display of lights. It was in dad's 37 green Packard Car with no back seat but a rumble seat.  I remember sitting on the back of the car with my best friend Lynn while the boys were in the front.  Yes those where the days,  Saturday we did the same thing in our neighborhood and delighted in the beauty we found.

Earlier we had gone looking for the snowy owls but only found eagles perched high above us with a superior wise look about them.

I was feeling awfully bad that I had not phoned my brother on Christmas Eve, but not only that it did not even cross my mind that night or on Christmas day.  Evidently he phoned here but did not leave a message.  I feel guilty and annoyed at myself.    Many, many years ago we had been closer when he and Traudl lived in Newton where he was stationed as a Mountie.  We celebrated several Christmas's together.  Now neither one of us like to travel and it has been many years since we have been together.  We keep in touch with our phone calls.

I know that guilt is an unhealthy feeling. 

"No man's really any good till he knows how bad he is,  or might be,  till he has got rid of all the dirty self-deception and squeezed out the last drop of the oil of the Pharisees."
--G. K. Chesterton.

It seems to be a part of of human nature to hurt those we love the most with an unkind word or selfish act.  This is often the gods of pride, arrogance, self-righteousness and self-pity working in our souls.  It is no wonder I am feeling shame and disappointment in myself.

So I confess and accept forgiveness from the grace that
 is God's heart towards us all.

The message of Jesus' words are that he did not come to judge or condemn us as sinners but open our eyes to see the wonder of God's unconditional love and hear the message of forgiveness, hope and new life.  Jesus came to be "a savior of boundless compassion, unbearable forgiveness, infinite patience and healing love."  Yes, he did at times get angry at those who abused others.

"what you did for those around you, you did for me".  Matthew  25:40

I am still learning.  I realize that I need to pray for the grace to become more loving.

         As I put away thoughts of Christmas I now put away thoughts of things I did not do.

           I am looking forward to putting up my new calender designed by Shawna.

                                Happy  Healthy and Hopeful New Year!

RESILENCE

                               My Christmas Catus blooms just in time.

Plants have to be resilient to survive in my house. Sometimes I send them to the hospital which is Sandra's house.  Either I forget to water them or I water them too much.  We all have our talents and it is important to remember no single person can do everything.  But we can keep trying.

Dad and I went down to the dyke for our outing today looking for snowy owls but it was a very gray day with low clouds touching the earth.  I did not stick to my plan to put my Christmas things away as Sandra noticed when she came over; bringing dad mincemeat tarts would you believe!  His favorite among many!  Nice warm socks for me just what I needed.

"A good head and a good heart are always a formidable combination"

"It is what we make out of what we have, not what we are given, that separates one person from another".   --Nelson Mandela  from "Notes To The Future."

This same theme is carried out in the book "Tattoos on the Heart"   Gregory Boyle created an organization to provide jobs, job training, and encouragement to the deeply scared gang members in Los Angelous.  They learn to love themselves and also find joy in loving and caring about others.  This is not easy when one comes from an abusive background and joining a gang is a way to survive.

 

Love and patience are so important as we struggle to be resilient.   A combination that allows compassion for others to free us from self-preoccupation and become aware of the problems and needs of others.
 

 

"Compassion is not a relationship between the healer and the wounded, it is a covenant between equals."  Authentic and caring and respecting.  Letting others share your pain and let them be a part of all you are.

 

In scripture Jesus is in a house packed with people and there was no more room for anyone to come in the door; so the friends of the paralytic open the roof (of straw) and lower him down to the feet of Jesus.  Outsiders need to be included if they are to be healed.  Jesus ate with outcasts rendering them acceptable.  "The world had deemed them disgraceful, and shameful and outside of God's love and grace."  Jesus looks at the heart.  Know that his love never lets go and if we cling to the sacredness of unconditional love we become stronger.

 

"Sometimes it's necessary to reteach a person their loveliness."  --poet Galaway Kinnell

 

When we walked through the park we discovered evergreen trees that had been decorated with a few tiny little balls and they sparkled even with the little sun light there was.

 

 Compassion flows from God who shares our pain and keeps picking us up when we fall
               and so with his help I believe it is possible to become resilient.

 

HEALING

 

    Sometimes life can be like trying to cross over a rushing stream on just the stepping stones.

Talked to Uncle Brian today, after several missed calls  and was very upset to hear Auntie Traudl has breast cancer. She has had an operation to remove the lump and will get the results next Wed. as to whether it has spread.  They have had to drive from Invermere to Cranbrook nearly 2 hours in very bad snow conditions.  They had to go in several times to have the different cat-scans etc.  As soon as it was discovered they got her right into hospital.   Traudel has a wonderful sense of humor and a fighting spirit so I am very hopeful that she will come through this, together with Brians's love and support. 

She will be having radiation treatment in Kelowna in January.  Before this she had been having some hip and knee pain and it finally seem to be getting better but now this.  Uncle Brian is very concerned about her and on the phone today I prayed for him when it is always him praying for me and our family.

I am praying that their faith will be strengthened and new hope born within them as God's love surrounds them.  Pray that as they travel they will be kept safe and that a miracle of healing will bring this promise true for them.

"For I will restore health unto thee..."
saith the Lord.
Jeremiah 30:17

I now that it is important to be positive but   first I am processing all the negative thoughts that I am feeling more than thinking.

I know that I am grateful for all of us and the good times  that we have enjoyed together.  I look forward to future visit with them.

I light a candle like we do at church for Traudl and Brian.  May the light of this candle be an inspiration for my prayer.  I pray for renewing of their faith and hope in the healing of God's love.

PROBLEMS

Everybody seems to have some problems in their lives.  Most of us put on a happy face.

Yesterday I accompanied dad on his walk in the forest.  I was taking a few pictures and having an enjoyable time; until we came to a very steep hill that would be a short cut back to the green area.

For me it became the Hill of Terror.  There was no real path and the way was covered in slimy slippery leaves.  It was so steep I felt like I was going to fall backwards.  I am afraid of heights and I am afraid of falling.  So first I tired walking on my hands and feet with my feet still sliding. 

Next  I lay down and crawled on my stomach very slowly.  My arms and legs felt weak and my heart was pounding.   There was no going back and going forward looked hopeless.Yes I did manage to finish the climb after burying my face in the dirt and resting awhile.  I was not smiling.  I think he was starting to worry.  Good to get home and have a bubble bath.

It was dense wood and no real path,

This is dad at the very beginning of our long trip. I think I was shaking all ready.  His boots have a good grip while my runners are completely worn down and I slip very easily. I had no idea how far up we had to travel with a gully on one side that I narrowly missed.

A little more fast paced than my walks with Gundy
.

 Everyone has problems from time to time in their lives and we have to find our way out and sometimes it is the hard way.

Did Jesus realize the full implications of the life he had chosen?  We said when we got married for better or for worse, in sickness and in health and those were important words to say.  They would not be easy words to live by and I still can find myself not as compassionate as I want to be.

I realize that Jesus was one with all those needy people who surrounded him day by day.  He taught them to see life differently and even he could not fix all their problems but he listened and cared and understood.  He lived out a message of non-violence that would influence others like Mandela and Gandhi and Martin Luther King.

Some of the lessons we need to learn in life seem to take a lifetime.  One is contentment that does not imprison us but still urges us to do better.  We live in a world of discontentment where new and better gadgets are wiving for our attention and telling us that what we need is the biggest the best the latest model.  So of course lots of people are out shopping right after Christmas looking for bargains that will fill the emptiness of disappointment.  This is perfectly normal and but is a bigger problem for some people than others.

 

We all have dreams.  Some are day dreams that actually come true.

 

LARRY'S IDEAS OF A SHORTCUT - NOTICE HE IS TAKING PICTURE - NOT HELPING WIFE!

 

"Human Beings have got the ability to adjust to anything."  --Nelson Mandela 

DISTINCT

I am so happy that everything went so well at Christmas and that everyone travelled safely and our time together was so enjoyable.

All the family gatherings that the rest of our families had together also looked wonderful.  Great to see pictures on facebook.  I had thought we would have lunch today, Wed. with Leah and Craig but evidently they are back in Ashcroft.  Hard to keep up with these young people.

So many choices to be made at Christmas time. From the decorations, to our choice of gifts, to the food we will eat,to the games we may play and also just as important  the less fortunate we can help;  to the time we spend just visiting and cheering up the lonely.

 

Yesterday  dad enjoyed some hockey and then we did our visiting and we had planned a walk but we left it until too late.

  I believe that if we could discover the true meaning of the words of Jesus we would find his distinctive contribution to our thoughts and actions would be to build up and love one another. 

 Healing words of acceptance and grace are  I believe is a universal message that echoes in the words of all paths of faith.    I also  believe in the super-natural. 

How can we believe in an invisible God. totally undetectable, unobservable and imperceptible to our senses.  I believe that He is invisible for our protection.  God is distinct and different from us human beings.  How very creative!  And yet in some strange way we can feel and know he is present because of Christmas.  The mystery of God becoming one of us!

"For Jesus Christ is God in human language."  --Anthony Destefano

TRUTH

"


















"Once in awhile you will stumble on  but most of us manage to pick ourselves up and hurry along as if nothing had happened."--Winston Churchill

I believe there is a profound truth in the story of Mary and Joseph.

It is a mystical truth that presents an ordinary experience as one that will become world changing.

Each year we are hopeful that peace will come and fighting will end; but with the anger and bitterness and the availability in every country of too many weapons hope is faint.  We all have to work towards peace the best way we can.  Celebrating with family is a good start.  Being part of our community and caring for those we live with and work with is vital.  Sometimes it is being at peace with someone who can be difficult so to have peace in our own hearts can be a challenge.

But on the other hand when we try to live by truth it can cause division.  Truth should not be suppressed for the sake of unity.  Does that make truth superior to peace?

I believe that the message of Jesus was to reveal truth that could bring reconciliation which was a difficult tasks.  Words can be misunderstood.

"We must, therefore, ever uphold our original ideal and of speaking the truth in love".
--James Atkinson, a Church of England Evangelical

We had some snow today mixed with rain but no snow stayed on the roads.  It is cold.

Yes, we did go visiting to see Cathy and Glen; three of the girls were home and the other two have left to visit other family.  The two babies were there and full of life and having a great time with a ball.  I visited with Tavia and Jasmine, her husband  Ryan's mom is in hospital with liver cancer so he was not there.  Ava was having a serious game of scrabble with her husband Jeff while dad talked to Cathy and Glen.  They have a very relaxed day on Christmas day with food put out on the table to help yourself.  Both the babies know sign language and it is amazing.

I enjoyed Christmas evening but did not talk to anyone very much which I guess happens more if you help clean up.  Watching Ben and Morgan open their pj's reminded me that we always opened pj's from Nana and granddad on Christmas Eve.  You guys must remember that?

I did miss the Christmas Eve service so will try and go next year if it is possible.

Trouble

Sandra are beautiful hostess. My computer is acting funny.

                                  

                    Morgan looking cute.

LITTLE ONES

                          Little Ones bring life and wonder to this special time of the year.

 

There is very little snow around now only big piles at the parking lots and little piles beside the walk way.

 

I just went for a short walk to see the ducks the day before Rick arrived.    It is cold and the streets are slippery.  The mall at White Rock had a group of children playing the piano and it was delightful as proud parents and grandparents watch in a circle around them. We also stopped to watch the children visit Santa Clause who was sharing his special gift of love and kindness with each one.  Happiness shone from the faces of the children and the parents.

Sunday church was a beautiful service with lots of music and a good amount of children.  The little ones are adorable.  Reading the story of Mary and Joseph and their little one can be a very moving experience is we enter into it realizing the danger Mary's life was in by carrying this child.  It was a harsh world and single pregnant mothers could be stoned to death.

I am amazed at the gravity of her sacrifice as a very young girl, maybe 14, and her courage and inner conviction that she was in the will of God.  Yes, every baby is special and needs a change at life.  The name of Jesus was given to Joseph in a dream "Yeshua" for he will be a savior.  It was not an uncommon name.  Even the commonness of his name reminds us that out of the ordinary, and even  under the shadow of his apparently scandalous conception; his destiny was preordained.

Rick arrived about five o'clock last evening so that was good as I was starting to worry because the radio said the road to Kamloops was not too good.  Good to catch up on news.  Rick is seeing Chris today and Chris is not coming to Sandra's place.  He is going to his mom;s but Leah and Craig are coming. so that is good.

 

 I remember in years in the past dad and I delivered Christmas Hampers to needy families. Oliver also helped. There are so many in sad situations and it is good if we can help to make  Christmas special for their children. When we gathered as a group to make up these hampers we enjoyed the feeling of wanting to bring happiness to others.  So thankful for the abundance of everything we enjoy in our lives.  Or at least I am.  Jesus also feed the hungry with food and with spiritual life.

Today as preparations are being made I think of all the people who have touched my life and helped me by lifting my spirits.  Sometimes it has just being adjusting to change.    Finding hope and healing.

I am thankful for the happy home I grew up in and for my precious children and all my grandchildren who are all great! This time of year we miss those who are so far away but never far from our thoughts.  Good to talk to Ken on the phone before he goes to work Christmas Eve.  We really need to pray for his eyes to heal with the eye drops because the operation is so very painful, as you would image any cutting done in the eye.

I am up early and the boys are still sleeping.

"Come closer to the common mystery.   Attend to the ordinary. . . . .
All the travelling of thoughts return to the beginning and recognize
the obvious.     It is wisdom that sees the ordinary  with amazement.
----Ray Grigg a poet and spiritual director.

MERRY CHRISTMAS Ken AND MELINA AND ALL THE FAMILY especially all the little ones but all the big ones too!

Merry Christmas Carol and Panteli!  and Kim! 

CHRISTMAS MORNING

                                     MERRY CHRISTMAS!!
A day to remember the gift of life.
A day to be truly thankful for our family and our friends. The joy of faith that lights within us a holy flame.     An unexplainable mystery!  God is with us all!
Knowing the promise of peace in Christ, we come to know joy!  --church liturgy.
The joy that brings to  us the strength and purpose to carry on.  Love comes with birth of new life.

We, Christians, hear the story of a deity's son  born to a humble carpenter and his very young wife in a cattle shed.  Shepherds come to this place after an angel appears to bring them the good news of a special baby.  In those days as now the world was a threatening place and they were waiting for peace to come.  The values that we can learn as we read this story carry on in all the world and in many other faiths.  There is a melding of the spiritual and the temporal, the religious, the secular, and pagans as the spirit of kindness and generosity becomes alive.  Good will towards others is good news.

Dad and I and Rick where the last to join the happy group.  The house looked so beautiful with the decorations Sandra had made.  Christmas trees turquoise in the middle of white lights as well as the big evergreen tree.  Sandra and Randy were busy putting the finishing touches on our excellent dinner.  Theresa ans Mikie, Leah and Craig were helping too; while Morgan was shaking every present under the tree.  All evening she wanted to open presents.  Craig and Leah were a happy couple and would be with her mom and Keith today.  Oliver was down visiting for a few days with Theresa and they went snow tubing at Manning Park.  He is taking the ferry as Rick is doing also over to Victoria.  Rick is travelling around but has not said much about his trip.

We did finally get around to opening our Santa presents which we make into a game where people can switch presents if they want.  A hilarious time!  We skyped Ken and Melina, Jassy and Mathew and a brief hello from Jesse.  Next it was Mary who looked beautiful with the glow of new motherhood.  Michael John was working.  The new puppy came to join her and it sure is cute.  She is also looking after a rabbit for a few days.

Today we may visit friends and dad and I may go for a walk. 
I know that the new reflecting vest that Rick gave me will make me more visible. So "no worries"!

Merry Christmas to all with all my love. 

THE UNEXPECTED

                                 This is a fun time of year to be open to the unexpected.

                                Dad and I ended up here unexpectedly.

Christmas is about a journey that can surprise us when we end up in an unexpected place.  We meet old friends as dad and I did when we were  out shopping.  We now go to different churches but still love to hear about what is happening and changing in their lives and the life of their church.  No matter where we feel we belong;  we take with us a sense of our own identity but also a sense that the unexpected can happen as  we build new deep relationships. 

The apostle Paul writes "I can do all things through Him who strengthens me."

I find myself being moved by those who are sad at this time of year,  My neighbor Jeff whose dear aunt has just died and for others who are not well.    For myself I am trying   to be open to new growth, new insights and new strengths.  God is mysteriously within us all and that image is " intrinsic"  to my identity and the way I see others.  The gospel writers all saw and heard the teachings of Jesus in different ways,  We would like them to harmonize and give us a clear picture of chronological events.

As we read about Mary and Joseph we think about all the unexpected things that happened in their lives.  After these amazing experiences they settled down to an ordinary life of being a family.  As a family they would become apart of a community where Jesus would learn about the scriptures, about prayer and worship, giving alms and acts of kindness.  He would be an observer with the heart of a desire to believe and to become all God may ask of him.

Spirituality can be linked to all human experiences but becomes more vibrant and alive with imagination and creativity.  Happiness and goodness, beauty and truth are all a part of what is called spirituality.  I feel it from within.  The miracle of birth speaks to the miracle of life.  Birth and death are part of an never-ending circle.  When we share these experiences of touching each others lives we gain wisdom and deeper compassion.  We all need to receive and give love along with sustaining hope.  Faith gives me hope as I trust in the awareness of God, my Savior.

I am reading Luke 1:47 in church today.  I am a little nervous.

My soul magnifies the Lord,  and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior.

Rick arrives to day and I pray for a safe journey.  Ready or not Christmas is almost here!

ONCE UPON A TIME

                               The garden at Shirley's house where we had our luncheon.

Thinking and writing about my parents seems to keep my memories of them alive and real!

Yes I still have some precious memories of being a child at Christmas. There was usually snow and that meant a lot of playing outside. There was the extreme anticipation and sleeping Christmas Eve was impossible. I remember making cookies with mom and decorating them.  Sometimes licking a bowl from the cake making.  Yes, and singing together when we did the dishes, Just silly songs.

Helping dad wrap parcels to be sent to his sisters and to parents in England. He was a meticulous present wrapper and had beautiful hand writing.  Then there was ignoring my brothers teasing about whether I would get anything from Santa or not. It was the only time of year we had wine, or it may have been brandy,  in the home. The dining room table was set just so with mom's best china. A very tradition Christmas dinner and of course  with stockings hung on the mantel of our fireplace that was not real; a Christmas orange and candies  .Presents were ripped open as fast as we could until I got older and wanted to save the paper and ribbons.

We always played Bingo after dinner with little prizes.

Even church was filled with an excitement and joyous music.

Dad and I listened and watched a Christmas D.V.D. with all the Christmas music.
The sound filled the house.

"The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree are the presence of a happy family wrapped up in each other.   --Burton Hills

Relationships Jesus would tell his disciples is what allows the love of God to shine into our hearts.
"God is not only in Me but dwells in all who will follow him."  John 14

  Paul tells us "You are sacred space, you are where the Divine One dwells."

My spiritual development began at an early age but I have had to continue to keep it alive and activated.  We each develop at our own pace to become spiritually aware.  I have noticed that people are friendlier, more open, more giving at this time of the year and I think because the spirit of Christmas is in the air.

Dad and I went out to do some Christmas shopping; actually he wants to buy me something, but we could not find just the right thing.  The traffic was bad and the parking worse, and the line ups long but people were friendly and helpful,  The joy of Christmas is thinking of others

Yes, Shawna Christmas is Coming!  I love getting presents don't you!

A ROSE.

                " A bit of fragrance always clings to the hand that gives roses." Chinese Proverb

It is in giving that we receive. This year we are not out looking, with all the frantic shoppers, for the perfect gift. Although done in a spirit of fun and of love it can be a happy experience. Years ago families often made presents and so put a lot of thought and creativeness into their gifts.  Times change.  Things that I would buy would not always be what some one else wanted.  Tastes change.
But I do miss the excitement of hidden presents under the bed.  Some lay hidden there through Christmas. 

Thursday I do my visiting at the Seniors Home and I know there is no better gift than I could give to Jim than his milkshake.  All went according to plan except after getting the milkshake I drove right by the Seniors Home and ended up about three blocks away headed of course in the wrong direction.
My visits went well and it is amazing all the stories some of these older people tell.  I was also given a present from the staff in appreciation which was nice.  Meanwhile dad was brave and went out Christmas shopping.

"Wherever there is a human being, there is an opportunity for a kindness."  -Seneca

In the morning as I looked out the world was black and white with some lumps of snow here and there.  I am not sure how slippery the path will be.  The day begins after writing;  with my journey meeting dog walkers and school children.  I am a big orange blob with white boots and wind-mill arms.

Words create change.

In my book I read about a gang member feeling his life is worthless runs from a rival gang and bumps into an old lady.  She stops him and says:  If anything happened to you, it would break my heart in two.  I have seen you playing with your nephew in the park.  I've seen you feed the homeless at church.  What a generous and good thing that is.  If anything happened to you she says again
I would be broken hearted"

Not long after that things changed for Speedy, her words had made him feel good,
and he decided he wanted to change.
---Tattoos on the Heart.

He had decided to what author Richard Rohr says" "live his way into a new way of thinking." 

I wonder how Mary felt when she told Joseph the news and he walked away. 
I  think they both would have had heavy hearts.   Thank goodness they both said yes
I think he must have loved Mary unconditionally.

Love creates family!


(Friday very cold windy and icy so very short careful walk.)

GIFTS

                                    This is at Theresa and Mikie's house.

The gifts that Christmas gives to us;
Wonder of the bright star,  the inspiration and faith of Mary and Joseph, the humility of the shepherds, the wisdom of the Kings from the East,  love as Mary looks with joy at her newborn child,  joy and peace found not in a palace but in a manger.

  The gifts we give to others: our kindness, generosity, gratitude, simplicity, patience and love .

To be able to celebrate with family and remember the happy moments and memories that have filled our hearts with love and contentment is all I need. Hugs and laughter! Happy and excited voices are music to my ears.

  The magic of new birth is told by the songs of angels as heaven and earth become One.
Retelling the Story! I am reminded of the power of One. There have been many great people who over the ages have changed lives and fought for justice and peace.  I believe that Jesus became a living example for them and for each one of us.

Our neighbor helping older folks put up Christmas lights.
Shoveling snow for us.
Cathy coming over from across the street for a visit.
The smile the paper girl gives me early in the morning.
A daughter going home from work to make cookies if her power is on!
A kind word on face book.
A patient husband who can also fix things.

These are all gifts of friendship.  As I joined the ladies at the U.C.W. luncheon today I felt a warmth and a genuine caring for one another.  Stories were told of past years and it was a wonderful time of sharing.  We met in a beautiful home and remembered other years of driving through snow just  to be together.

But it is also tired overworked parents and over excited children.

 So it is happiness and sorrow, especially for those grieving a loved one, but all of it wrapped in love.

"How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world."
--Anne Frank

VISION

                  We look beyond our own understanding to catch a new vision of the future.

Religion as we have understood it is slowly fading and hopefully changing to be more inclusive;
 but the Spirit has the power to breath new life into it.

Four wisdom's
The wisdom of religion
The wisdom of philosophy
The wisdom of science
The wisdom of nature.

Also the ancient wisdom of women is now being given a place, although Wisdom in the Bible is called She.   I believe that spiritual life, expressed in different ways, will always be a part of human nature.  An awesome alive sense that there is more to life,  than humanly we can see or experience.  We live in a materialistic world most of the time.

"We need to cease our industrial assault on the planet and "renew our human participation in the grand liturgy of the universe.|"  It is time to take into account the needs of all life forms.
Thomas Berry,

This is the good news of Christmas!

The facts are that here on the West Coast it is common to reject religious institutions and opt for either atheism or considering oneself spiritual but not religious.  The other reason according to Douglas Todd is the fact families are just too busy.  When I hear that I think that most of us can find time to do what we want to do.

Dad and I finally got together with Jane and Geof for lunch and it was so much fun just chatting away together, not worrying just relaxing.  Yes, we met at the White Spot which they have up-dated and it looks good.  They are also very careful and helpful about the food that is gluten free. 

Christmas is coming and the only presents I have bought are for the food bank.  I want to give to those who have so little when we have everything.

Yes, Shandel it would be good to skype.  We are at Sandra and Randy's Christmas Eve and home here Christmas day; although we may visit our friend Cathy and Glen.  We have seen all their children grow up and helped them through some difficult times.  Five girls! ! Now three are married with babies and the youngest two in college, moved out on their own.  Unbelievable!  !

Yes I did go for a short walk in the snow. It is still snowing at 10:30

ETERNITY

                                  A mother plays at the park with her child.  A picture of love.

.Robbie lived to the end for her family and surrounded by their love it was her time to move on.
Body and soul are one on this earth but now her soul has entered eternity.

God has made all things beautiful in their time.
He has set eternity in their hearts,   Ecclesiastes 3:11

Dad and I felt very sad hearing that Robbie had died; but also a sense of relief,   In life there will always be death.  I believe that each one of us has a unique contribution to make in this life and Robbie gave a huge amount of love to her family and to her friends.  I know her love will live on in each of her children's lives and that of her grandchildren also. She will be missed and grief fills our hearts for all.

For my dear mom I know she had a life-sustaining certainty  that heaven was real and that her own mom lived on there.  I can remember her telling me that as a  very .young child. 

In the presence of God there is a fullness of joy and rest for the weary soul that now is healed and set  free.  We taste a bit of this goodness in our own lives every moment of the day if we choose to see the beauty that surrounds us. 

Our prayers for Robbie have now been answered.
 Now our prayers are for her family to find comfort and healing as they go through the grieving process. 

Prayer whether spoken or silent has the unique potential to be a means of giving and receiving love.

My soul alone waits in silence,
from Him comes my salvation.
He alone is my rock and my salvation,
my fortress;  I shall never be shaken.

My meditation is to meditate on scripture and on nature and on the precious gift of love we celebrate at Christmas.  Love has the power to heal.

Here I am returning from my morning walk in the snow - dad waited with his camera to get me.

Home to a nice warm kitchen!  My nose is dripping but I feel good.  This was Saturday.

Sunday a day of prayer.  For me prayer is a way to express my love and to express empathy and compassion but also to inspire helpfulness. When you know what it feels like to be helpless you want to know how to support others when times are tough.  I believe in a force for good that is beyond our comprehension, but a source of strength and amazing grace.

However and whatever we say to God can be a prayer expressing our deepest feelings;  anger, fear, worry, loneliness or despair and let me not forget thankfulness but let it be from the heart,

This is my walk.  Can you see the snow falling?

Sunday dad and I looked after the great grandchildren, Morgan still not feeling well.
Supper was a bit of a mish mash as I had put little thought into it  Looking after the children was enough for me to cope with.  Dad picked up some chicken and chips from the Safeway.

After supper Sandra and Randy dropped by after a busy day shopping. Wow they had a fabulous time dancing up a storm at their office party.  I don't think Sandra missed a dance!

When they all left it was snowing lightly.  I was thankful we were not driving.  I was ready to fall into bed so I did.

Monday  will see if Gundy wants to walk and hopefully see Jane and Geof.

WHY

So much darkness but still the light is always shining whether we can see it or not. I find myself asking "what kind of world is this we live in?"

Chuck and Mickie and Michael are with Robbie. She is being surrounded by love to the very end.
Death comes as a friend  to take us out of the darkness into the greater light, from coldness to warmth.

But we question why young ones die before they have lived.

Went for a walk in the falling snow which I love to do.

Talked to Theresa who wanted to be here but Morgan was very sick with a temperature and a cough.  dad and I decided it would be a good idea to drive out to see her.    Ben had been at a sleep over and had arrived home very tired out. No one slept.Theresa had been up with Morgan all night. 

Ben and dad shared a pizza and then he fell asleep watching cartoons. The traffic on the road was a disaster because of an accident on No. 1 Highway. Two lanes heading into Van. were closed; that was on our way out.  The snow followed us out to Chilliwack but the children were not able even to go out and let it fall on their faces.


Very slow drive home but made it just in time to receive a call from Oliver on his long drive home. He is working long hours but hoping to save up enough to buy a home. We hope he will be at Sandra's on Christmas Eve, along with Rick, Leah and Craig, Chris, Theresa and Mikie and Ben and Morgan.

Another day gone by quickly but so deeply aware that we have such a loving family and I am so proud of you all!

We are staying home from church waiting to hear if Theresa may need to drop the children off or just if we are need.  Waiting for news.

Snow at Ben and Morgan's

Too tired

Too sick

THE POWER OF LOVE

                                             What amazing shapes the trees in the forest make.

Dad's leg hurts and will take a long time to heal because of poor circulation.  He can walk on it.
He had another walk this time by himself yesterday. (Friday)

Sandra has phoned just before crossing the border to make sure we are behaving ourselves

Yes I have studied  Buddhism. a little and it has some very good teachings and certaily has the power to shape our lives in positive ways.  I think it can help us understand our Christian faith but ai experienced as a child the powerful love of Jesus and that is who I turn to for strength and guidance.

The last time we visited Robbie dad and I saw  and felt the love as we entered the room.  The young girl with the guitar and beautiful voice was singing;   "Bridge Over Troubled Waters."  Tears filled my eyes.  I said a little prayer to myself.  We hugged Chuck and left.

"There is no fear in Love; but perfect Love casteth out fear."   - 1 JOHN 4:18

I  think the greatest fear is not knowing what the right thing to do is.  We want to do the loving thing.
but not always sure what that is.  I am reminded that one should give love, time and energy in what ever form that can be.  Sometimes it is a prayer and sometimes it is something just practical.

Muhammand's exhortation.

What actions are most excellent?
To gladden the heart of a human being
To feed the hungry,  To help the aff;icted
To lighten the sorrow of the sorrow of the sorrowful
To remove the wrongs of the injutrf.

That person is most beloved of God
Who does the most good to God's creatures.

Then horrible things happen like the shooting of the school children in a Connecticut school and the horror is beyond understanding as we grieve for all those hurting families.

VASTNESS

                      "It is precisely in the light of God's vastness and acceptance of me that I can                                         accept my  careless mistakes and the harm they may have caused to others."
                                                                    -Tatoos on the Heart.

                       A vast blanket of leaves covers the forest path.

Yes I walked with dad in the forest today just to make sure he is careful. I am always amazed how vast this Water Shed Forest is and how many different paths there are. As we walk silently along it seems like we are all alone when out from another path comes a lady, a dog trainer, walking four dogs. She tells us stories about each one of them.

Coming home and later in the day I look out at the sky and am amazed at how vast it is. There is a little bit of brightness but heavy dark clouds hovering over it all. I will not walk so early in the morning but you have to be so careful no matter what time of day it is.  At least I do not have to worry about wild animals.  Just skate boarders and bikes; which also come wheezing past us in the forest.

Dad asked me if there was anything I wanted to do or anywhere I want to go before I die. Now that is a vast question. I will have to do lots of thinking about this.   We have received cards of people travelling on many trips but it is not something I am yearning to do

. Time spent with family is still the most precious.

It means a lot to me when Morgan hugs me and says "thanks for coming." Dad and I have travelled many miles to see our family and it means a lot when they appreciate our visits.

Yesterday dad and I spent the day searching for things we couldn't find.  Today dad his  final visit to the dentist.

I am amazed at the vastness of God and His Love and His Joy. Especially at this time of the year. "Divine love is incessantly restless until it turns all woundedness into health, all deformity into beauty and all embarrassment into laughter." from --Tattoos on the Heart.

This the vastness of God is so much bigger than we could ever understand.

OUR VISIT

We have driven off the freeway and are now on our way to Theresa and Mikie's house.
 It was a rainy day; nice and cool.  We arrived in good time!

 Our prayers and our love encircles all their family at this time.

I love going into a school where children are racing about, so energetic and happy. I love hearing the sound of their voices so excited, laughing and having a good time.

I take a peak into Morgan's classroom.

Ben is somewhere in the mix of the choir. Can you see him?  The music was excellent.
They were very enthusiastic.

                                                              Morgan on stage.

Dad takes a picture of me and Theresa. Their house looks lovely all ready for Christmas.  We tried some new things called Veggie Pakoras.  Very good and different for a change.  I hope all goes well for her with her test on Friday.  What a busy time taking the children back and forth to the school for the pageants.

                                Everyone is happy and excited!

It starts to feel like Christmas.

Every year I think back to years gone by.  I think of all the things I loved as a child.  I think about all the ancient roots of our most beloved traditions, as we gather to hear the story about the angels and the baby.  Now it is a time for people of all faiths and beliefs to celebrate the hopes and dreams that are in all our hearts.