THERE IS A WAR GOING ON INSIDE OF ME

All the bad germs are getting eaten up by the invaders and I am feeling sick to my stomach again. But I saw a wonderful lady doctor yesterday at the Hilltop Clinic and she thinks I had the shingles, the last fight of that losing battle. Her name is Dr. Mercer maybe she is new to the clinic.

I am very low in spirits especially about creating those silly albums so I am saying the Serenity Prayer and am giving up for awhile. I know it is so easy but I just make one wrong move and there they go down in a row.

Dad is complaining there are too many daisys in the front garden I am sure this is all God's fault maybe he likes daisys.

I am not going to read "Jesus mean and wild" just now I do not think I can handle a mean Jesus.

The Guernsey Literary and Potato Pie Society is very sad right now talking about the Ravensbruck Concentration Camp and it makes me feel sick at heart, soul sick, just to read about the awful conditions. How can people be so evil.

Anyway I am looking forward to a visit by Theresa, Ben and Morgan. They slept over at Kim's and went to her soccer game. Theresa already knows more about Celiac than I do. She thinks if I get completely strict I may get more energy so I am trying to be better. I could have bought this big piece of cake for $3.50 which is silly. Maybe I will get all excited about cooking and if dad does the cleaning up that would be wonderful.

Anyway I have nothing to say today so I hope the comments are profound!

THE NEW ROOF

ANOTHER FAILED ATTEMPT TO CREATE A ALBUM

JOB FOR TODAY GET THE BEDROOM READY FOR MARY AND MICHAEL JIHN

EAT CHERRIES BEFORE I GO FOR A BRISK WALK

HOW DO THESE BLINDS GET SO DUSTY

UP AT 5:30 AND SEE COLLEEN READY TO TAKE HER DOGS FOR A WALK.

BOOKS

Books fascinate me and there is nothing I like better than having a "good" book to read. I have read many books about Jesus and to my amazement more and more are being written. The Jesus book I am know reading is titled "JESUS MEAN AND WILD".

I find scripture itself to have new meaning each time I read it. I love Jewish writers that reveal a whole new meaning to the Old Testament. Then there are people like Johathan Goldstein, at an early age thinking he wanted to be a rabbi, has now written a book described as neurotic and irreverent all about the stories of the Old Testament. His relationship to religion is certainly not very "religous" and his approach to faith is "We try to reject it with the rational mind, but it hovers like a giant question mark that won't go away." So he uses humor to describe that God knows what he is doing.

We need to find more humor in holiness which seems almost like a contradiction but where would we be if we could not laugh at our own mistakes and see other people as different from us and yet in many ways the same.

At Colebrook church we sometimes do what is called sharing the peace of
Christ as we say "The Lord be with you" and we shake a hand of give a hug.
Several weeks ago I met the "hugger" so enthusiastic he rabs his arms around you and crushes the breath out of you. He did this to Shirley Fowler our dear elderly friend and hurt her. She had tears in her eyes and was shaken up. Evidently he has been told by the minister and by others and they put their hands up to show they do not want to be hugged. He apologized again and again to Shirley.

We had a beautiful church service where Randy, we do not call them reverent anymore, built on the theme of the celebration of Native spirituality. I had mentioned the week before that it was a day to remember their past and for us to help them on their difficult journey.

We came demanding them to learn our religion and took away their freedom to live out their stories. One thing I have learned reading is that we all have our opinions about faith, about Jesus and definetly about God.

I was so fortunate to have such good memories in my childhood to build a loving faith upon. This faith has changed from being simple to becoming complex but the wonder and the joy never leaves me.

I wish others could know the comfort and security and the amazing energy that radiates in the beauty of this world. My life has known many sad and lonely moments struggling with undiagnosed illness which was even wrongly diagnosed. I was told I had house wife's disease {what is that] to being told I had less than a year to live. The years of past poor health have had some lingering affect but I consider myself healthy and so fortunate that I can enjoy walking and seeing nature and meeting others and greeting them.

I have learned the wisdom that comes when you pray and the blessing that can touch others you pray for. I believe that we need to think positive thoughts about each other and that also can be a way of blessing them.

My dearest friend Jane and I do not agree on everything but she has helped me find a more balance way of understanding faith. I am learning to listen to others if they are sincere in their searching. Yes, we Christians have been told we think we know it all but I have never met an unbeliever that was not certain of what they believed and would mock the faith of us who are believers.

The world needs all kinds of people with different opinions and I am willing to learn but not to let go of my faith upon which I have built my life and which has carried me through "troubled water". I am no hero I do not think I have ever saved a life in some dramatic way but I have had an influence on others.

LIVING THE WORD

HERE IS BETH FILLING UP OUR CAR WITH A BUNCH OF CLOTHES SHE BOUGHT AT A YARD SALE AND LUGGER SIX BLOCKS HOME
VIEW FROM OUR LITTLE WALK ALONG THE SURREY FEN

WHAT IS A CHRISTIAN? HOW DO I LIVE MY BELIEF.

For me this means searching and re reading the scripture and learning about the past history of those who wrote the Bible and those who have translated sacred living words into our daily understanding.

I think that we all are spiritual misfits looking for answers but for me I long to know more and more about the true heart of God, the creator and sustainer of life. I believe that deep inside of us something responds to a greater scourse of strength that draws us into a place of amazing love! !

Is it believing the right words or is it doing the right things?

I believe that our faith needs to be put into action and that most people in the church do the things they like doing. I work at the book selling both,

I do not like working in the kitchen I feel too slow while others are quick and know exactly what to do.

I like discussing my faith with others and reading the Bible so I attend and support Bible study. I help by visiting the sick and lonely because I have been both. I take clothes and help at the Oak Ave. Free Store because I love children and think they should be clothed and cared for.

COMMUNITY BARBECUE

MOM - HOW DO YOU GET THIS THING ON?

FOOD ALWAYS BRINGS FRIENDS TOGETHER

OUR NEWST NEIGHBORS - FROM AUSTRALIA

THE BRAINS BEHIND THE IDEA

BUT DADDY- I DONT WANT TO HOME TO BED

MILAN WITH LARRY - NEW GREAT FRIENDS

THERE HAS TO BE A HOCKEY GAME GOING ON!

NO ROOM FOR CARS - JUST KIDS - MOM'S AND DAD'S AND FOOD



It was a beautiful evening for the block picnic - and most of the neighbours

dropped by to say hello.

NO BIRDS SANG

We walked around the Serpentine Bird sanctuary and we did not see any birds or hear them. I think we went about 1/4 of the way. It was a beautiful sunny day with a little breeze; a good day to feel alive and just be happy.

After going to the White Spot and Choices in White Rock I had a short rest and went to Colebrook to help set up for the Strawberry Tea. I will be helping by working at a book table selling books. Dad and I will go early and he can have my strawberry shortcake.

I am so thankful Theresa found out what is wrong with her. I totally related with the way she was feeling especially the not knowing. She had started re-acting to any wheat right away. She is reading all about it and looking up receipes. I remember I use to be like that.

It took about 15 years to find out what was causing bloated stomach and extreme fatique. I had so many tests and the doctor would say I cannot find anything wrong even though your blood work shows you are very anemic and other problems. That was depressing news for sure I wanted some answers. When I went into the hospital when they found out what was wrong I was told my blood was just like some one straving. I had given up until I heard a voice within me say go back to Dr. Horn. This voice nagged me until I gave in.

Granted I had turned to prayer to help me through and prayer will always be apart of my life.

"Prayer is not a pious gesture at all'
It is a response to the One whose heart beats [one] with ours. "

___Joan Chitester--

IS GOD FEMALE OR MALE OR BOTH I DO NOT KNOW OR CARE BUT IDO BELIEVE THERE IS A MASSIVE, BEAUTIFUL HEART FULL OF LOVE AND COMPASSION THAT BEATS FOR US ALL

The spiritual life is not easy but for me life would be so much harder if I did not listen to the whispering Spirit in quiet times and tell Him my deepest thoughts.

I like the Native Creation Story where God appears as two beautiful eyes and a being full of light. Dr. Phill talked about children in Heaven walking with God and each holding a candle.

THE STAFF OF LIFE

WE STARTED OUT THE DAY WAITING AT THE DOCTORS OFFICE
FINALLY GOT IN HERE - SORT OF A WASTE OF TIME - HE SAID IT COULD BE THE FINAL FLARE UP OF THE SHINGLES AND I COULD STOP TAKING THE HORRIBLE ANT--VIRAL MEDS -

LATER IN THE DAY - GOT A CALL FROM OTHER DOCTOR - HAVE A BLADDER INFECTION - NOT SUCH BAD NEWS - FEEL BETTER.

This is my bread that I just made; now Theresa and I are both celiac. She sure had all the symptons and now is ready to start her new life style. I have been sharing with her my journey that took many years before I was diagnosed. We will share receipes etc; she is enthusiastic just what I need because I have become so bored with my diet.
AFTER THE DOCTOR VISIT - HAD A WALK IN THE FEN -
NO DUCKS OR ANY OTHER LIFE AT ALL - BUT A LOVELY DAY.
WE WALKED TO THAT LOOKOUT THING IN THE DISTANCE

THIS IS THE HALL AT COLEBROOK ALL FIXED UP FOR THE STRAWBERRY TEA. IT WAS FUN TIME GETTING THINGS READY.

MY FOGGY MIND

THIS PICTURE WAS TAKEN ON THE WAY HOME FROM LEAH'S GRADUATION.

I am feeling so much better today and even my mind seems clearer. I am not so full of energy that I could climb the grouse grind; nor will I go for my big walk with Janet, but I will be able to enjoy my reading and maybe I will treat dad to the White Spot. He made himself beans for supper and seemed quite happy. He did all the running back and forth to the store.
But first I will try a short walk and I am praying I will not feel so irritable.
I thought it was interesting in my Guernsey Literary Society it all starts because one older man finds a book by Charles Lamb with the name written inside the cover. She writes for the newspaper so he is able to get in touch with her. Living on the island where are very few books he writes to her to ask where he can get another book by the same author.

This starts a correspondence with her and he explains that the book club was invented as a way for people to get together in the midst of very difficult times with the German occupation. She wants to write about the people on this island and how they coped living with fear and restrictions and little food to eat becasue the Germans took their animals and their food so they made things like potatoe peel pie.

It is fiction but all the characters that live on the island are delightful and of course there are always some mean and difficult ones.

"What is the practical, moral and philosophical value of reading" is the question one man asks who has always been too busy to read. I cannot immagine not reading even not having several books ready for me to start.
A book store is my favorite place to shop and as I look at all the books I think hasn't everything been said.

Every book I read I find gives me a different view on life and as I read I write down what makes me stop and think.

"Men are more interesting in books than they are in real life."

"Did any of you think that along about the time the notion of a SOUL gave out, Freud popped up with the EGO to take it's place?"

"a mind can make friends with anything."

Anyway I could go on but I am in awe of those who write and bring ordinary life to life with humour and honesty. My books are my friends and I am delighted when an author I like produces another volume.

I like writing my thoughts down in the morning when my mind seems clearer and my thoughts have an energy all their own. I do not like reading over what I have written so I guess that is why we have editors.

"Man did not climb out of the slime" that I heard on the T.V.

Yes, In the beginning was the Word and out of that Word life was created.

I am continually amazed by each one in our family, so different yet so loving and caring. I thank the Dear Lord daily for you all! ! !

BENS LAST SOCCER GAME OF YEAR

A REAL ACTION SHOT

BEN BREAKS AWAY FROM GROUP

BIG BEN MEETS LITTLE BEN (WHITE HAIR)

A GREAT BIG CHEER FOR THE OTHER GUYS

SEEMS THEY HAVE LOST THE BALL

It sure was a beautiful day for the game - at a lovely park in the

wonderful Fraser Valley. All the players from both teams did their

best and had a wonderfull time!

MY RESTFUL DAY

I did not know when I wrote early this morning that I would be given this day to rest and read. No early morning walk by myself or with Jane. I just felt too sick and too weak.

A WOMAN'S SONG----- BY lINDA MACDONALD

Spirit soaring all around me,
I feel your voice when I am still. . . . .
Deep within and all about me
constantly your presence will
fill my weary bones with fire.
Kindle in me, strength anew.
Push me on when I am tired
I'll come and rest with You!

ALL FOR THE LOVE OF READING

My cherry tree is my temptation tree! Much more tempting than an apple tree, but both were tempting as children to sneak and pick!

READING!

I love reading because it touches deep with in your heart and it carries you away into another world so that this world becomes so real you have to keep reading. It brings strength and joy and inspiration to our souls longing for something deeper and mysterious.

"The woman took a quick breath, opened her eyes, sat up and looked around. She was sitting on a riverbank, surrounded by flowers and an abundance of plant life. Every variety of bird and animal stood, perched or floated nearby, watching her. She was young, she was beautiful and she was naked."

"Hundreds of pairs of eyes silently watched her as she struggled to absorb everything in sight. Everything-everything-was entirely new to her and she was overwhelmed by the beauty and wonder of it all."

"Ant then she noticed one pair of eyes watched her with greater intensity. They belong to a creature whose life form was much like her own. She sensed a kinship with this being whose body glowed softly within"

This was her creator and this is the beginning of a native story about creation. She actually had fallen through a hole in the sky. The world was created as beautiful and peaceful and the gift of words were a miracle that allowed expression and understanding.

"That was the moment when we were given the sacred responsibilities that shape our lives. That was the moment that shaped how we think and what we believe."

I have never really imagined the story of creation but in this story of native spirituality it is alive and real and draws you in to want to read more. I still love the Bible version that starts "In the beginning God [the holy sacred One whose very heart beats in all creation] created the heavens and the earth. He created us with a soul, an awareness to experience joy and wonder, pleasure and generosity, fear and anxiety, sadness and grief. We were created to share ourselves intimately with one another; to listen and to care and to help bear each other's burdens especiall in our thoughts and prayers.

My first memerories are going to the library with mom and coming home to read about "Babar the Elephant". It is wonderful to snuggle up close and listen to a story. Thank you mom! [I think of many things I never really thanked my mom for]

Reading has helped me through difficult times to escape into the jungle of another's thoughts and experiences. I started reading mystery stories Agatha Christy and then Perry Masion. I then went on to read true life stories about lawyers and I still like stories about court battles.

I found solace in reading as did the bone and rag man in "The Guernsey Literary and Potatoe Peel Pie Society" He becomes excited when he reads the words of Mr. Carlyle "Does it ever give you pause, that men used to have a soul--not by hearsay alone, or as a figure of speech, but as a truth that they knew, and acted upon!" One can believe one has a soul not because of the words of a preacher not even believing the Bible [which I do] but feeling it in your own heart in the grace of silence.

I guess that is enough for today. Now for my questioning family. I talked to my friend who has re occuring shingles. They come as a very painful itch which I find makes me feel weak and tired and yes irritable. I have her special oitment that really helps and also the anti-viral meds. Which reminds me I had better go down and take my medicine. I am better at reminding dad but sometimes cannot remember if I have taken a pill or not. Pat asked me if I am feeling stressed. The noise on the roof is stressful and I have been getting overtired. I will probably see Jane today but will not go visiting. I need my two naps a day now.

In fact I recommend napping as well as reading! I must admit that reading when I am tired puts me to sleep.

GREAT SUPPER BY MIKE AND MARY

Mary and Michael John come over to cook us a great dinner. I had a headache and two naps after a busy morning at Oak Avenue hanging up children's clothing. What a loving pair we really appreciated their visit and their feeding us!

THE RED HATERS TEA WITH VERA AND HOWARD

A group from Colebrook have been invited to a tea at a retirement place and we are to wear red hats. I am sure it will be fun! But if it's tea and sandwiches and cake woe is me that is not for me. I had better take some of my exciting glulten free stuff.

We enjoyed a wonderful supper; Swiss Chalet Sauce Receipe, cooked by Mary and Michael John, pictures later. We really enjoyed the visit and appreciated their thoughtfulness. They already had a busy day making final wedding arrangements.

I do not know if I am being a foohish old woman; but actually dad insteaded I go to the doctor with this rash that is very itchy but no pain.
If I had not had the singles before and if I had not heard from a friend who gave me some oitment to put on if I broke out in a rash and to get the medicine. I should have phoned her but she is hardly every home but maybe I will e-mail her.

I must admit I felt panicky thinking I may be getting shingles again. So, the bottom line is the doctor was not sure but is checking the blood to see if the virus is there. This may take awhile. I feel a little weak and the pills give me a headache and I think make me more tired. I had two naps yesterday even with the noise on the roof. Just proves you can get use to anything more or less.

THERESA'S PICTURES

A daughter and some floosy

Two good looking people

Sister and Brother - happy

Mom (beautiful) with her two beautiful Daughters

lots of activity

What a lovely smile

Two strange looking people - the coming trend in clothes??

A lovely picture - of the brains behind all this

A Grama and a Great Grama

Some very special friends of Mary come for big surprise

Well Sandra you sure look the part - but dont know about that Fag.

Justice and his favorite Aunt

Three generations - all with big smiles

Kim with her thinking face on