In the past on Sunday miring we use to hear the bells chiming from our church but right now they are not working. This is our church where we attended when our children were older and where we saw our grandchildren christened. We have attended many services with our families and have many rewarding memories.
Church is like a family in which there are many different personalities and lots of different opinions. I find at home as well as church that when my love of God and His love for me is secure I can work through disagreements and disappointments.
Sometimes it is as simple as letting go of expectations; of understanding how complex and compicated we all our and how we need to be treated respectly with gentleness. As I grow older I find myself doing stupid things and I find myself very unhappy with myself. I need wisdom and grace and forgiveness and above all patience! I would love to never have that feeling of annoyance rising within me but I am not there yet.
It is easy to be full of praise for God and life when we have many things to be thankful for but maturity comes when we realize we can be thankful for the messes we make, and for the weaknesses we have. We all have our responsibility's to work at being peacemakers in our homes and in our churches. We all have deep unmet needs and we help meet these needs by reaching out to love and comfort others. Laughing together is healing.
Inside of us there are deep undercurrents of anxiety, insecurity, anger and yes pain.
I have found healing in the church when I knelt at the feet of Jesus; and when I have been willing and honest about my imperfections.
I will find my special pool even if it takes someone else to show me the way.
2 comments:
Beth, your honesty with your feelings is remarkable. I don't think I could be that honest, even with myself, let alone to tell others....I must work at being more honest with my difficult feelings, ( the happy feelings are easy aren't they) and need God's help and guidance to do so. Being honest about things, instead of "sweeping them under the rug" let's one learn and grow doesn't it? " Sweeping things under the rug" keeps things simmering....which can be the root cause of illness and repressed anger. Your teachings are remarkable. Now to follow along! Oh by the way I am exceedingly honest about other things...i don't want to give the wrong impression here!
At age 66 I am just beginning on the journey of becoming older and learning that there are changes coming that will be difficult to accept. No one said that getting old is easy....that is for sure.
I will add you to my prayers Beth.
with love,
Nancy
That's right - don't give up on finding the pool.
Love,
Rick
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